(Closed) I don't feel like myself in wedding dresses. How did you handle this?

posted 6 years ago in Dress
Post # 3
240 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Honestly?  I had to will myself to not freak out and vomit.  I realize that for most people they are all over the bridal experience but for me, it was a terrifying experience.  Every dress I tried on made me feel like an alien and I was just not into it.  Looking back,  I think the entire experience solidified the fact that I actually was getting married and the upcoming life change was really overwhelming. 

My advice to you is to keep on trucking on.  By the second appointment I realized that I was in better hands as I had the same consultant that helped my sister out when she got married.  I surrounded myself with lovely people and was able to be open minded enough to try on any style she threw at me.

The results worked out.  I came out of there with a spectacular dress that’s *shock* bridal but still me…just a very FABULOUS version of me.  LOL!  Laughing

So key words?  Surround yourself with people who know you well and keep an open mind.  You never know what you’ll end up with!

Below is my dress in champagne.  I would have kept it this colour but my mother pitched a fit and insisted on ivory.   *insert eye roll here* Even though I’m over 32, that woman still gets to me!!!!  Yell


Post # 4
1306 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I agree with PP. You really just need to keep truckin’! The very first time I tried on gowns it was very awkward and surreal. It seemed like they were kind of costume-y. After the third time, they were starting to grow ion me and eventually, I found my dress. Now after the wedding, I wish I could wear it more!

If after a few more appointments, you still do not feel comfortable, maybe you should start looking for a nontraditional brisdal gown. maybe a different color (blush, silver, grey), maybe a different lengthe (tealength, with a cardigan??), or maybe a traditional dress with nontraditional accessories?

Post # 5
1547 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

@Natto:  wow! your dress if gorgeous!!!


OP, what about trying non white/ivory wedding dresses?

How do you wanna feel on your wedding day? Chic? Romantic? like a Dramatic? i dont know, what’s your style?

Maybe you can talk with your consultant and tell her what are you expecting to feel the day off your wedding, and she/he’ll find the right style that makes you feel “you”.


Good Luck ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 6
5956 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

Just remember that your overall bridal look doesn’t end at a wedding gown at all.  If you find something you like very much, that looks nice on, there are literally a thousand things you can do to make it you!  From adding some offbeat accessories, to having it died or maybe just embellished with colored stones, feathers, lace…the sky literally is the limit and I understand that budget is an issue that doesn’t mean you can’t create a look that is perfectly you!

Post # 7
4057 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

whatever you wear on your wedding day will be your wedding dress ๐Ÿ™‚ I felt the same as you – I never thought the white dress, in any silhouette was “me”. So I found a dress that is “me”. Yes, I found it in a bridal shop and it’s made as a bridal gown, but for most people it’s nontraditional – the color is natural/coffee so it’s not white oreinvent champagne. It’s tea length as well. It’s very me and since I’ll be wearing it ags getting married, it’s a wedding dress ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 8
240 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Anamagana:  thank you!!!  Smile

Post # 10
2808 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

have you thought about having something made? that way, you could do something that’s more “you” in your head. or maybe try vintage stores or online.

everyone will find “the dress”. but sometimes you have to think outside the box.

Post # 13
27 posts
  • Wedding: May 2013

I hae been feeling the same way.  My bridesmaids (all but 1) are very fashion forward and I am a tee shirt and jeans girl so dress shopping was an experience i was dreading and putting off.  I like very simple things without alot a frills.  To make matters worse I too have image issues.  I gained over 50lbs in 3 years so I really am not happy with my body even though everyone tells me I looks fine I dont feel “pretty”.  I tried on many dresses the first time I went shopping and most where dresses that everyone else wanted to see me in since I had no clue what I wanted.  I found the style of dress I like(fit and flare, or a-line) but I still have not had that AHHH monment with a dress.  I keep thinking its just me because dresses are not my norm.  Now if I went shopping for a new pair of jeans I have no problem having the AHH monment where I love a pair.  I think its because no matter what dress it is I am just not used to wearing or seeing myself in a dress.  I did go shopping by myself yesterday and with no ones opinion but my own I found 2 dresses that I truely feel comfortable in and yes I could see myself walking down the isle in either of these dresses.  But I still did not have that AHH this is the one monment and I really do not feel like I will.  I did try on a vera dress at Davids which everyone with me loved and it was extremely beautiful but the dress is just not me.  here is the pick of the vera at Davids it is very non traditional and more modern with more frills than I like but It was a very pretty dress. I say try shopping a bit more and maybe even try going by yourself like I did find what you feel comfortable in and take pictures, go home look at the pictures and think about the decision.  That is what I am doing and I honestly and I think its normal to have doubts or wonder is this the dress because it is a big decisiona and for alot a pretty big purchase.  Good luck I hope you find the dress.


Post # 16
264 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013 - Lake Taghkanic State Park

That dress is gorgeous and looks great on you!!

The thing that stuck out the most to me in this post is that you are a cardigan girl! That’s a great way to make yourself feel more comfortable, I’ve seen some gorgeous wedding photos of women who wore a colorful sweater with their wedding dress…

Especially if you are having a somewhat non-traditional wedding. Accessorizing it with things that make you comfortable is a great start. If people are still cringing at the idea of you wearing something over the dress of if your wedding is a bit more traditional, you could always go without it for the ceremony and then wear it for the reception! ๐Ÿ™‚

I also found a post from another cardigan wearing bee here: http://www.weddingbee.com/2008/04/02/pink-ruffles-and-sparkle-a-recipe-for-success/ !

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