Post # 1
my sister is not engaged but has told me she is planning on getting married thousands of miles away a few months after my own wedding. i dont see how she can expect me to afford to go to this after my own wedding and honeymoon. Would i be expected to cancel my honeymoon that my fi abd i have trying to save so hard for? I dont want to miss it but what can i do?
Post # 3
I don’t understand why you have to cancel your plans? We need more details of your situation, but until your sister is engaged, it’s all talk and speculation. I’d wait to see if she gets engaged. Then go from there, but it’s possible that you might get money as wedding gifts, which could help your situation.
Of course you cannot count on this, but I feel like you also can’t short change your own life over your sister’s wedding and she can’t short change herself over yours. Now, when a person decides to have a destination wedding, they should be doing so with the understanding that if they don’t fund 100% for their guests, they can’t be upset if guests can’t afford to be there. Don’t get me wrong, they are not required to fund it, but that’s the only way to ensure someone will be there.
So why are you feeling it’s necessary for you to be at your sister’s wedding? Sentimental reasons? she’s guilting you? you’re in the wedding? What?
Post # 4
@honeybee1999: I think its just because I didnt imagine not ever going to her wedding. I am worried she would think I was selfish for going on honeymoon and missing her wedding but I have been clear about my plans for a long time before this.
I am trying not ot beat myself up about this as I know they must have a strong idea that I wouldnt be able to go for not only financial reasons but logistically getting time off work for both would no tbe possible.
I guess you are right unless you are paying for everyone you cant expect 100% of people to go!
Post # 5
A lot can change between now and then (finances, relationships, her plans etc). Don’t worry about it until it’s more definite.
Post # 6
I agree with the others. If it’s just all talk then don’t feel guilty.
Post # 7
@Happybee1985: I know how that feels. I felt that I had to be there for my little brother’s wedding and found a way. They went on a ship and did it. But I wasn’t planning my own wedding at the time.
I still advise you not to shortchange your own wedding and honeymoon because of anyone else’s plans. Your sister’s wedding can’t come before your own.