(Closed) i don’t know what to do! help!!

posted 9 years ago in Venue
  • poll: Should I plan the wedding I want or plan one that is convenient for everyone?
    plan your dream wedding (savannah)! option 1 : (20 votes)
    53 %
    plan with your guests in mind (michigan) option 3 : (10 votes)
    26 %
    do it where you live (atlanta) option 2 : (7 votes)
    18 %
    some other option-please explain : (1 votes)
    3 %
  • Post # 3
    3332 posts
    Sugar bee

    Personally, I think a fun destination wedding in a cool city would be great.  If it were me, I’d do the dream destination wedding in Savannah.  If your guests can’t make it, you could always have some sort of party/reception back in Michigan, so that they could celebrate with you, too.

    Post # 4
    596 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2009 - Ceremony: The Kraine Theatre, Reception: Midtown Loft & Terrace

    I think you should have your wedding wherever will make YOU and YOUR Fiance most happy 🙂

    Your wedding location should be about you and not what is easiest for your guests. There’s being a considerate bride and then there’s being too considerate! Some of your guests will have to travel, no matter where you have it, so make your wedding what you want it.

    It will be more expensive to have in a city, there’s no doubt about it. But it’s never impossible. I was dead set on having a NYC wedding and was willing to sacrifice some aspects and DIY a lot of things to get a gorgeous venue that we otherwise wouldn’t have been able to afford.

    I hope I’ve helped! Just remember, that in the end, it’s about the beautiful wedding that you two want! Keep us posted.

    Post # 5
    332 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2009

    What venues have you looked at here? There is such a range of options for every budget. I say go with your dream wedding in Savannah–it’s definitely worth it! This city is the best one to get married in! PM me if you need any further advice!

    Post # 6
    200 posts
    Helper bee

    If you want Savannah, do Savannah. Some of your friends & family will love the opportunity to take a lovely vacation.

    Just be prepared for some disappointment though. We chose our wedding locale based on our preferences and, consequently, many of our good friends will not be spending the day with us. Travel is expensive! 

    If you can handle the fact that some people WILL NOT spend the $ to travel to Savannah, then go ahead and do it. Have your amazing dream wedding. If having every single family member in atttendance matters, you might want to make a different choice. 



    Post # 7
    483 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2009

    I’m going to Savannah in August!  Glad to hear it’s nice :))) Hehe. 

    Go with your dream-this is the one day that you get to be the boss! 🙂

    Post # 8
    531 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I voted for the old house in Atlanta- sorry to be a party pooper  I’m just a firm believer that a wedding should not break the bank and you had mentioned that your dream option would really be pushing your budget or over it. Thats just what I would do though, in the end do what makes you guys the most happy. Maybe you could ask around the hive for reccomendations of not so expensive places in Savannah for your wedding.

    Post # 9
    10218 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 2010

    I voted for the house in Atlanta as well… you can honeymoon in Savannah or have a wedding weekend with a day trip to savannah :D… I don’t think that the wedding should break your budget either! 

    Post # 10
    244 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2008

    I think there are two things to consider

    1) If Savannah goes OVER your budget (i.e. you go into debt). It’s not worth it. No wedding is worth being in debt over and you need to plan something within your range.

    2) What is most important to you? Is it important to you to be surrounded by friends and family or to have the look of the wedding of your dreams?  Would it be o.k. for you if not many people could make it? Even people close to you? For some people this is fine and they have wonderful, beautiful weddings with their nearest and dearest 25-50-75 people.  Other brides though can’t understand why people won’t travel across the U.S. during a recession for their wedding and get their feelings hurt or feel bummed that people they considered close couldn’t make it or that they can’t have the 200 person wedding of their dreams. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve seen brides upset on these boards because people "had a whole year to save up and plan" and not "enough" people were coming to their destination wedding

    Prioritize what’s most important to you.   


    Post # 11
    1037 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2010 - Carlouel Yacht Club

    Ok, this is definitely a difficult topic!  I feel your pain!  I have mixed feelings about this one…

    Although the initial reaction is to say "have the dream wedding in Savannah," I’m not so sure that would be the best option…if you have done extensive research and realized that it is going to almost break your bank to have it there, I would be hesitant to do it.  I know that Savannah is just the most charming city…but could there possibly be somewhere else that exudes charm as well?

    If the FI’s family and your own live in MI, I would tend to lean towards having the wedding there.  I am going to be living in VA for the rest of the time up to my wedding (I’m moving in 2 weeks), but both my FI’s family and my parents live in FL…so we are going to be having the wedding in FL.  I’m going to have to do the long distance planning for many things, but knowing that my parents are able to help out with meetings and decisions and planning is really a great thing.  Plus, I know that my FI’s family wouldn’t all be able to attend the wedding if it were at a destination.  I am just excited about the fact that we can have everyone together to share the day with us…not so much of where it is located (of course, we do have to have a great venue…but that isn’t the point).  I would be so sad if some people weren’t able to attend because of the money/travel issue.


    Good luck! 

    Post # 12
    1956 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2010 - Tannery Pond at the Darrow School

    I think a wedding in Savannah sounds wonderful but you might have to be prepared that the wedding might be smaller than you had originally planned on due to people unable to afford the travel expenses, etc (which could also help with your budget if you have less people!)…If you’re ok with that, I saw go for Savannah!

    Post # 13
    2004 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2008

    When you envision your day, which is more important: the friends and family being there, or the place that you’re in? I agree that Savannah would be wonderful for a wedding (I grew up in Atlanta and have been to Savannah a bunch of times) but I question what would be the point of a destination wedding if it costs you more money than you have and if the most important people in your lives can’t afford the cost to make it.

    I had to make this choice too.  You may be the "boss" of your wedding day, but if you choose an expensive option in this economy, then lots of your family might not come. To me that wasn’t worth it. And people will not always want or be able to take the vacation that would go along with your wedding, even if they are theoretically interested.

    I chose a hometown wedding because it was the most economical and most convenient for the majority of our guests (we live in DC, wedding was in GA). My parents were generously paying for it, and they said that we could either get a smaller wedding in DC or a bigger one in GA. Although DC would have been nice for us, we would have been spending lots of money on plane tickets, hotel rooms, and restaurants. Also, my fiance’s family are from Mississippi and Tennessee, which are driving distance to GA, whereas DC is not so much. We went for the bigger wedding in GA. Lots more people came because it was in GA and looking back I am really glad of that. 


    Maybe you could go to Savannah as part of your honeymoon? Or you could take a trip with your fiance/husband and do an engagement or post-wedding photoshoot there? 

    Post # 14
    2695 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2010

    I am a destination bride. My family and friends live in Houston. His family and friends are scattered all over the US.  We decided on a venue about 5 hours from Houston.  We did this for three reasons 1) all his side would have to travel so it didn’t matter to them where the event was held 2) our venue is totally us. We are getting married in an old WWII airplane hangar with old planes and cars. We both love cars and he is a pilot. So it was a place that we both love! 3) The venue was half the cost of rentals in Houston and the food/beverage prices were almost half what they cost in Houston. 

    If the venue is going to really push your budget then you need to decide if there are things you can cut back on i.e. cost of flowers, food, photos, attire.  You may be able to find cheap hotel rooms or rental homes to help the cost of your family.  You may also look into flights into surrounding cities that might be cheapier.

    Even though the economy is bad I just had a friend have her wedding in Puerto Rico and 100 people went.  Ask family members what they are willing to do.

    Post # 15
    272 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2010

    My Fiance and I met and live in NYC, and all of my family is in FL.  We could have had a wedding in FL to make it easier on them, but that would have been very hard to plan so far away, and it was important to us to get married in our church in NYC with our church family there.  So NYC it is.  You’ll have to figure out what is most important to you- in a way, we "sacrificed" family for church, which was totally the right decision for us.

    Post # 16
    174 posts
    Blushing bee

    I think you need to take some time to think about what is most important to you – the "feel" of your wedding and how it looks in photographs, or the people at your wedding. There’s no right answer, it’s very personal.

    Our wedding is in my hometown, which is a destination for a large majority of our guests, however, because our guests are scattered around the world anywhere would have been a destination. Our location has special meaning to us, which is very important, but I did not anticipate feeling so disappointed and downright sad when "no" responses came back. In the end people mattered most to me and if there were a convenient location for everyone, I would have chosen it.

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