Post # 1
Here my story…
I’ve been with my boyfriend for 12 years… I’ve been waithing to get egage for the longest time (8years). I finally got egage but end up giving my ring back because I discovered I got egage for the wrong reason and I couldn’t lived knowing he didn’t do it the way I wish. Im at a point were I don’t know what to do…. im sad, angry, hurt and now the only thing I think is went he going to proposed the right way again. I truly believe he love me but his blind by depression. I have to accept he need to get help with his depression but during that time… im still here… back to girlfriend boyfriend situation and wait…. Im tired of waithing. What I find funny from him… he call me his women… almost like calling me wife and its killing me. He wants to put the money on a house first but I want to get married… he keep finding excuses to push the wedding.
Im starting to think im never get married…
Post # 2
You must be in some emotional chaos right now, but your story is a bit muddled.
You said: “I discovered I got egage for the wrong reason and I couldn’t lived knowing he didn’t do it the way I wish.” What did you mean? Isn’t the only reason for an engagement is to marry? If you wouldn’t mind elaborating.
You also said something about: (1) You can’t wait until he proposes the right way and (2) he is blinded by depression.
There’s a large chunk of detail missing from your story. But here are my suggestions:
1. Let of the fairy tale. I think him proposing is a sign of engagement. If you are aiming for a more formal engagement, then I think your expectations might not be lining up with his.
2. His depression sounds off. What I understood is he proposed inappropriately BECAUSE of his depression. I would get this in perspective as depression is a word commonly used here in the Bee. Even when someone is just a bit down, not crazy hyper, people already accuse them of depression. Maybe he’s just mellowed out, stressed and all. That doesn’t equate depression. Please don’t web diagnose your boyfriend.
Again, this is an advice per the small detail you gave out.