(Closed) I don’t like FI’s Best Man. Long rant!

posted 6 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
Member
3697 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Um… good luck?  MrJ has a few friends I don’t care for also, and luckily he’s only invited a couple of them to the wedding (one in particular I’m UNHAPPY about).  At least his Bridesmaid or Best Man is his brother and will behave. 

Post # 5
Member
777 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Wow, your Fiance sounds really insecure if he has to lie about you and criticize you to his Bridesmaid or Best Man so that he can feel sufficiently “manly”. He should be bragging about how wonderful you are.

I don’t think talking to his Bridesmaid or Best Man about this is going to be helpful. I think talking to your Fiance about how “real men” are capable of honesty and self-control might be more effective. This guy cheated on his wife with a stripper and he still feels the need to impress him? Please.

You could also try pointing out that having a floppy dick on one’s wedding night doesn’t rank particularly high in the annals of “manliness.”

Post # 7
Member
3092 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

This is just me but I think it should be talked about and with more than one person.  I think you and your hubby can talk to Bridesmaid or Best Man about how excited you are for him to be present but that you have some expectations.  I think your hubby should be doing this as well because ultimately it is his relationship and his friend.  I think you and your hubby or just your hubby could also talk to other Groomsmen about keeping Bridesmaid or Best Man in check but also supporting your hubby in making good decisions for himself.  And I’d talk to your Maid/Matron of Honor and enlist her help as well. 

I’m in a similar boat and we are taking these precautions because the Bridesmaid or Best Man is an important person to my fiance but we’re not willing to allow any individual’s behavior to make us uncomfortable at our own wedding.

 

Good luck!

Post # 8
Member
777 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@PinkFlemingo:  Hmm, ok, if you say so. Different strokes, I guess. Personally it always makes me uncomfortable when men/women start kvetching about their SOs in their absence (or worse still, in their presence!). I always try to change the subject. Guess I’m a wet blanket 😉

Post # 10
Member
3569 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Honestly  I think you need to talk with your fi, you shouldn’t put up with him treating you that way to show off for his friend. Ultimately at the end of the day he is responible for his own behavior and how he behaves when his friend is around is his fault and no on elses. By the time we are adults I’m not buying the whole peer pressure thing, your fi needs to know his limits with drinking and when to stop regardless of who is around.  Your Fi shoiuld lay down ground rules for his party if he knows how his friend behaves.

The guy is sleezy for cheating just plain gross, on the brightside since he lives far away you probably won’t see him much, and you can make yourself busy when he comes to town! Or perhaps when they go shooting since your Fi is claims you aren’t into that, you can “accidently” shoot best friend in his behindWink

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