Post # 1
I’m usually not one to tell other people what to wear but I disapprove of my mom’s intended reception outfit. It’s non formal so I completely understand that she doesn’t want to wear a dress. I have no problem with that. But she wants to purchase this mismatched hodgepodge of white Capri pants with brown and orange (I can’t decipher whether they’re flowers or polka dots) with zippers on the bottom, and an oversized metallic gold sweater. Refer to the episode of The Golden Girls where Blanche has dinner at the house of the guy in a wheelchair if you want to know exactly what the sweater looks like. Now, if she already owned this outfit and didn’t want to buy something new I would have no qualms with it, but she actually saw this in a catalog and wants it. Should I say something or keep my trap shut?
Post # 3
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
I would tell her and show her the episode of Golden Girls. But my mom knows I am brutally honest. Tell her you don’t want her to look like an old lady when she’s not an old lady. Tell her to save the gold sweater for the nursing home!
I would be constructive though and show her some pictures of outfits I do like and think she will also like.
Post # 4
@Aquaria: I would suggest that we have a girls’ day together- go shopping and out for lunch.
That way you can have some input.
I don’t normally think the bride should have any say in what the MOB wears, but there are exceptions to every rule.
If you don’t live in the same area, I would email her a few alternatives without mentioning my feelings about her chosen outfit.
Post # 5
@Aquaria: I say no – she’s an adult and gets to pick her own clothes.
That said, you could find a an outfit that you like and think she might like and send her the picture along with a very casual note about, “saw this and thougt it could be another option to consider. This color/style/whatever would look great on you.”
Post # 6
I also am usually the type of person who thinks that adults can pick out what they want to wear and the bride shouldn’t have a say in it. In this situation, though, it might be one of those things where later she looks at pictures and says “why didn’t you tell me I looked like an old lady?!” I have a feeling that if your mom really knows the outfit is too old for her, she won’t want to wear it any more. So, yes, I would say something about it to her, but be nice about it. Something like, “Hey mom, don’t you think that outfit is a little too old lady for you? It looks like something from the Golden Girls! You can totally do better, you should get something more flattering!”
If after all this she still wants to wear it, though, you have to let her wear it. If you say something to her about it, the ball is in her court at that point, and it’s her choice.
Post # 7
@Zhabeego: I’ll probably do that. I even found an outfit i like for her at Kohl’s which is the style she’s going for (somewhat dressy capri pants and top but comfortable and easy to dance in) that is not quite as “loud” I guess. Those pants she wants though, YIKES! They even look bad on the model.
Post # 8
@Aquaria: LOL. You could probably seal the deal by saying something along the lines of, “Those pants don’t seem to flatter the model very well. What do you think about that cut?”
Post # 9
@Zhabeego: seriously though! If the model was also 56 and a size 14 maybe she’d have an argument… but as beautiful as my mother is she could never pull off an outfit like that.
Post # 10
There’s nothing you can do if she really has her heart set on it, but maybe you can be really nice and point out that you think another outfit would flatter her more. Make it about how nice she would look in another style.