- 5 years ago
- Wedding: October 2013
Hi Bees. I need some perspective.
On a recent visit home, FH and I have basically figured out my Dad has a girlfriend. He hasn’t mentioned it, he’s not really a talker, but there were super obvious clues. He also mentioned we only gave him one seat, and what if he wants to bring someone. I told him we only gave him one seat because everyone he knows will already be there (literally!) but if he’s bringing someone please let me know ahead of time.
Now, my dad isn’t a modern, savvy guy. He’s an old school, 65 year old ex marine who literally lives in a cabin in the woods, with no one around. My mom passed away three years ago, after that he moved into his cabin and built it into beautiful home for himself. It’s extremely hard to imagine him having a legitimate conversation with someone, let alone dating.
Now, I absolutely want my dad to be happy. If he found someone, good for him. It’s hard to imagine and kind of awkward, but he deserves it. However, I’m not comfortable with him bringing a date to my wedding. Hear me out, before I get flamed.
It’s already hard enough for me to imagine my wedding without my mom there. She is my best friend. On top of that, I don’t want my Dad to show up with a woman I have never met. He has never been an affectionate person, and seeing that, with a woman who is not my mother, whom I have never met, on my wedding day, is a really hard pill to swallow.
As I mentioned, he isn’t a talker. Its basically impossible to have a reasonable conversation with him about something other than fishing or grilling, so having a heart to heart with him about this is not gonna happen. I’m just not sure what to do bees.
I feel guilty and selfish, but at the same time my heart hurts. I’m ok with the idea of him dating, but I don’t want it flaunted on my wedding day, when I’m missing mom more than ever.
I’m just not sure where to go from here…