- Ms. Sloth
- 8 years ago
- Wedding: May 2011 - Bartram's Garden
I hate coming to message boards to complain, but my mother really pissed me off today.
I think I posted about this way back when I first joined, but as a reminder, the boy and I want to have a very intimate wedding, but my mother is insisting that we invite five of her girlfriends and their S.O.’s. Out the of the five, we barely know three of them, and we have never met two of them.
My mom has volunteered to pay for those ten guests, but that’s not really point. The point is that we don’t want strangers at our wedding. We’re having a small wedding because we want one, and we want to be surrounded by people we love, not by people we barely know.
My mom has been relentless about this. She says that she was invited to all of their kids’ stuff, so she has to invite them to mine. I think that is, pardon my French, total bullshit. I’m not even inviting everyone whose wedding I’ve been to! A few weeks ago, we were out with one of my bridesmaids and my mom confronted her and asked her what she thought. My bridesmaid sided with my mom (which REALLY pissed me off. Even if she secretly agreed with my mom, she should’ve backed me up, I think). I was really pissed off at my mom for bringing my friend into the family drama.
And then today, on the phone, she brought it up again. I told her that I might be willing to put her friends on the B-list, so that if ten of our guests didn’t come, then her friends could come. Well, that wasn’t good enough for her. She said that I didn’t respect her and that I was hurting her. I shot back that she didn’t respect me or the boy and our wishes for an intimate wedding and that she was hurting ME by causing drama in what was otherwise pretty much a drama-free wedding. We eventually managed to kind of let it go for now, but it’s not over.
But then, her next words were “Your sister says that you’re considering yellow bridesmaid dresses. I think that’s a terrible idea because yellow doesn’t go with everyone’s skin tone.”
And by that point I was so pissed off that I just said that I hadn’t decided on anything for sure yet, and if I did decide to go with yellow, I knew that my friends would be nice enough to wear it without complaining, and that it was none of her business anyway. I’m not going to make my bridesmaids look ugly. I wouldn’t do that. But my mother shouldn’t have a thing to say about it. I am 34 years old and the boy and I are planning our wedding completely on our own, and if we DO end up letting my mom invite her guests and she does pay for them, that’s the ONLY money she’d be contributing.
I’m so annoyed. And I’m disappointed in myself for complaining on a message board, but I’m snowed in and have noplace else to bitch!