- 5 years ago
- Wedding: May 2014
Ahhhhhhhh! I’m a wreck and I’m making it worse because I’m upset with myself for being upset over things that are ultimately unimportant!
I’m stressed out about school (which I’m doing fine in).
I’m stressed out about trying to find work for the summer (thought I had something working out and now I can’t seem to get in contact with them).
I’m stressed because Fiance is stressed about the promotion he applied for (he has the best credentials but the least amount of time with the company).
And the logical part of my brain knows that all of that is going to work out. I have 4 weeks left of school and I’m getting A’s in 6 out of 7 classes and a B in the other class so unless I don’t show up for the finals I’m going to pass all of them all. Even if I don’t get the job I’ll be ok and I do think I’m going to get it. I have another one that I’m also following up with. I just got my hopes up for the first one. Finally Fiance is going to get the promotion. I know, his co-workers know, he is the only one who doesn’t think the job is his.
Now I’m home alone waiting for Fiance. And on the way home I found my first placeholder ring. It’s a full size and a half to big and I lost it almost 2 months ago on the dirt path I walk home. I thought it was gone forever. Well now that I have it back I’m upset that I don’t have a “real ring” yet (I’ve paid for both of my placeholder rings. It’s my fault for getting impatient and proposing instead of waiting. But ever since Fiance said he still wanted to get me a ring I feel a bit cheap from time to time with my $30 bands). And of course I don’t have a job at the moment and Fiance is worried about money too so now is a horrible time to be having a breakdown about this.
Uh… Also, the doc put me on the birth control pill to help regulate my hormones and now I feel like a total psycho. I just needed to rant sorry.
Oh. I also have a gerbil trapped in my bathroom. I found the poor thing in the stairwell of our apartment complex this morning, shivering next to the box it had clearly come out of. I’d passed the same box coming home last night but thought nothing of it. But I was headed out to school this morning and had to stop and help it. Thing is… my cat really wants to eat it. So far no one has come to claim it even though I’ve posted notices on all the doors. I don’t even like rodents!
Something is also leaking in our utility closet. Well was leaking. It looks like Fiance was dealing with it when he had to go off to work. Not that I can talk to him while he is at work. So I have no idea.
What do you do when you know you are being insane and don’t want to be?