(Closed) I don't want to go to my baby shower now VENT!!

posted 4 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 2
1938 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I’ve never heard of someone planning their own baby shower. I think you’re overreacting. The only leg you have to stand on in this situation is that your cousin should be there if you want her there.  


Post # 4
4376 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I understand your frustation, so feel free to vent.

That said, I don’t know anything about UK showers, but generally speaking, in the U.S., the hosts plan the showers (bridal/baby), not the bride or mother-to-be. At the most, we have input on the guest list, but not the theme, invites, cake, etc. You ARE a guest – the guest of honor. 

Post # 5
8694 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I don’t know about in the UK, but here the mother-to-be does not plan her own shower. It’s just an invite.

Post # 6
2610 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - Madison, WI

While I also understand where you’re coming from I will second PPs and say typically here in the US the “guest of honor” has no say in the planning of a shower aside from agreeing to a date and the guest list. I had no idea about the invites, food, anything to do with my bridal showers. The same could easily be said for every baby shower I’ve attended.

Post # 8
18 posts

I think you have every right to be upset and frustrated that they’ve taken over your plans. I don’t know what you can do besides explain how you’re feeling. Sorry. 

Obviously different areas have different traditions, here (in Australia) baby showers I’ve been to have always been thrown by the mother and a friend or family member. 

I like you have never seen a shower completely left in someone else’s hands. 

Post # 9
69 posts
Worker bee

First of all ((Hugs)). I think at this point all you can do is just throw your hands up, and just go and enjoy the shower. Dont have any expectations. Sometimes when people annoy me (and this would have me LIVID) I just say FUCK IT and as my SO says “embrace the random”. <br /><br />Also, instead of getting mad that you are now a guest, maybe you could just accept that role, appreciate that your mom loves you and your baby to throw this and just enjoy it? and NEXT TIME dont let her plan it LOL!!! Over the next few months you might need your mom so no point in pissing her off over a shower <3

Post # 10
2070 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

Yorkshirerose1991:  sorry, but I think you are behaving like a brat. A shower is a party where people bring you presents. Your mum and sisters are graciously hosting you such a party. So be happy and have a lovely time. Stop getting so angry over invitations and cake. They do not matter! Not one bit! Is this really worth fighting with everyone over? The only thing I think is an issue is that you should ask to invite your cousin if you are so close. 

I have to agree with your mum that you are spoiling this for your sisters. They are 16! They are excited to be aunties! It is lovely that they are putting so much thought into doing this planning for you. So thank them, smile and be gracious. 

Post # 11
4518 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

The thing is, the baby shower is something that other people throw for you. So that means they do the invitations, the menu, the decorations, everything. They can ask you for input on whom you want to invite and what you’d like to do, but, as they’re throwing the party, they do everything. 

Try to sit back, let go, and enjoy having others throw a party for you!

(And I also dislike surprises, but I don’t think not knowing what the invitation looks like counts as a surprise. A surprise shower — yes, that’s  surprise. But you know when and where this is happening, so any surprises will be very minor.) 

Post # 13
256 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012 - Motor museum

I am sorry but I am from the uk and I didnt plan my shower. 

Post # 15
256 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012 - Motor museum

No to be fair I didn’t. 🙂

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