- 8 years ago
We’re under 50 days from our wedding and I’ve just found out that my FH has been lying to me for months about paying our rent because of his pride. Long story – kinda short – when I moved in with him in January (and when he ask
ed me to marry him) 2 weeks after I was served an eviction notice. Apparently FH and his previous roommate hadn’t paid rent for months. Fortunately, I had just gotten a student loan and put $5,500 of it towards this debt, that was not my own. We had a long talk about it and I thought it all had been resolved as a lesson learned. Apparently, in February, FH didn’t have his half of the rent, but thought he’d catch up on it and didn’t tell me. And so is the story for the last several months, in fact. I’ve been giving him my half of the rent since I’ve moved in and I thought he’d been paying his half to our landlord too.
I received an eviction notice, again, yesterday and am completely crushed. I’m still in love with FH, but now I don’t trust him. I had a weird feeling for months and had asked him every week or so if we were all set on bills/rent and he kept telling me it was all paid, when it wasn’t. He’s been lying for months and I’m completely broken over it.
I’ve given him an ultimatum – come up with the money owed and July’s rent too by July 1st, or else I will call off the wedding and move out. I don’t want to leave him for good, but I cannot be with him (and marry him in August) if he cannot rectify this in the next few days.
I’m really just emotionally overwhelmed with all of this – and the fact that every spare nickel I have has been paying for our impending wedding. I’m quite ok with the possibility of cancelling the wedding and am able to swallow my pride to do so, but I pray to God that he can hold up his end of the deal between now and the 1st and we can move forward with finances that I control (to avoid this in the future).
I’m not really sure what advice I am seeking, but perhaps some sort of solace that potentially cancelling the wedding isn’t going to destroy me.
**I am a regular poster here, under a different screenname, but have opted to create this name to avoid potential judgement should this problem be resolved.
I suppose I should clarify that his employer did not have hours available to him for a few months, but also did not allow him to collect unemployment. So I knew he didn’t have much money coming in (which is why I constantly checked on bills being paid) but thought he had been figuring it out somehow. He is working full time again for now.