Post # 1
So a year ago my best friend and I got into a pretty big fight, she really hurt me and I decided to stop putting effort into the friendship because I realized how one sided it really was. Well I have really missed her but did my best to not reach out to her because I felt she needed to be the one to try to bring us back together because I was always the one keeping our friendship going. I knew if she didn’t come to me then we would end up back in our same cycle and I would get hurt again. Well I was really happy on birthday when she reached out to me and we had a nice but pretty generic conversation. Today I decided that since she had reached out to me I would offer to take her to lunch and we could try to work things out. I mean we were friends for years and I was her maid of honor, she was best friend and I really miss her. So I got on facebook because I don’t have her new phone number and she deleted me! I am so hurt, I know I shouldn’t be but what was the point of reaching out to me when you are going to completely cut ties less than 10 days later? I feel so stupid for thinking we could ever be friends again. I can’t believe I let myself get sucked in by her again. Ugh sorry I just needed to vent but if you have any words of wisdom that would be great.
Post # 2
- Wedding: July 2014 - Prague
Are you sure she deleted you after the conversation? Maybe she deleted you a long time ago?
Post # 3
prahajess: Yeah I’m sure because I looked her profile the day after our conversation and it still said we were friends.
Post # 4
Awww that really sucks. My best friend of 16 years and I are drifting away at the moment. She kept letting me down, I realised,like you how one sided our friendship had been. I took a step back. Didnt hear from her in two months (she is busy but me too!) I reached out. Went out of my way, now nothing. I feel your pain.
Post # 5
I’ve found it’s easiest to cut ties from those kind of people. My “best friend” began drifting from me about 4 years ago. I kept trying to keep in touch with her, show her I cared about her and our friendship and got almost nothing in return. She would never talk to me unless I initiated the conversation, and even then it was brief. I eventually stopped trying and honestly, it hurt, but not much really changed. It hurts now but it’s probably best to let it go and move on. Don’t forget the times you had as friends but find some friends that actually care about upkeeping your friendship.
Post # 6
- Wedding: July 2014 - Prague
alyssaC: Well, that sucks, and I agree– it’s very odd to bother reaching out and then doing that.
But the sad truth is this will happen again and again as you get older. It always sucks, but I guess it’s just life.
Post # 7
prahajess: I agree – as you get older and enter into new life phases, friendships often change or even end. It is sad but I’ve made some new and great friends in each life phase and even if I don’t keep in touch with all of them, we still had good times.
Also, it’s better to be selective about who is in your life to ensure your efforts aren’t wasted. It is hard but it’s worse to feel used and taken advantage of. “Giving up” a friendship that is no longer worth it probably wouldn’t change much – you didn’t see each other before and you don’t now.
At least now there is no expectation or potential to be hurt/let down.
Post # 8
alyssaC: That must have been so hurtful 🙁 I am sorry that you friend treated you like that. I had this happen to me a few years back with a girl I was very close friends with as well. You can still usually message someone on Facebook if you aren’t friends, but I wonder if your friend is still hurt about the argument and after talking with you couldn’t see past it. You deserve better than that.
Post # 9
somethingblue04: Yeah my mom kept asking me why I wouldn’t reach out to her even though I missed her so much and I just kept saying that I would rather have no friendship than a bad one. I don’t want to waist my time on someone who doesn’t appreciate everything I have done for them. When we actually got to see each other we had the best friendship and could talk about everything. She was the one of the few people I could really open up too but it’s just not worth it to keep going through heart break with her.
Peach.Candy: You can still message them but obviously she doesn’t want to hear from me 🙁 I guess I could see if she was still hurt but really she was the one doing the hurting. O well… now I feel like I can really move on from the friendship. I’ve been holding out for her for a year and now I can see that our friendship is truly over.