Post # 1
It’s been a few weeks since our wedding and I’ve been dreading the photos but I was looking forward to the video. I knew I didn’t photograph well but I thought on video in motion it would look more like me. I just saw it and I’m so glad my husband was in bed becasue I’m mortified. I couldn’t believe it was me I was watching, I’ve never felt more horrific and sadly it was coming to the realization it’s what I actually look like. I’ve only seen the “good angle” and even though I knew I had a double chin and big arms, stomach, back, I didn’t know it was so bad. I wish I could take it all back but it’s too late. How on earth do I deal with this?
Not to mention, my husband is classically good looking and I feel undeserving of him. He tells me he finds me attractive but most woman know how lucky I am to have a man that will do that but also how hard it is to believe..
Post # 2
Pictures? I am sure you look great!!!! Individuals tend to be over critical of themselves. Also, stop looking at them and take a break. If you keep glancing them you’re more likely to nitpick.
i totally understand how you feel though- my fi is extremely photogenic!!!
Post # 3
holisticbabe : thank you so much for taking the time to reply. It makes me feel less alone in this. I’m a little nervous to attach these but here’s the best shot i’ve seen and one of the worst that I got from the video.
Post # 4
melobean : wut, I was expecting some hideous photo! We’re *all* our own worse critics. You look radiant! Your skin is peaches and cream flawless too!
Post # 5
melobean : All I see is an elegant and classic bride with flawless skin, and beautiful eyes. That’s what your pictures show.
Post # 6
melobean : Girl you look great! I hope I look as beautiful as you on my wedding day and fingers crossed for clear flawless skin like you had!!!
Post # 7
mrstodd2bee : I don’t know what to say, I guess I’m just not used to that face shape. I weigh over 200lbs now and used to weigh 150-160 and never really noticed how it looked on me until the wedding.
Thank you both. You were really able to give me some confidence back that I thought was very long gone. I’m so glad I had the courage to post and you all were there. It made more of a difference than you know.
Post # 8
I think you look happy and gorgeous!!!
Post # 9
You look beautiful!! Looking at my wedding pics, I knew I didn’t look perfect but the memories of being SO happy made me feel better. Love your bouquet by the way!
Post # 10
Is that the worst you could do? I’ll say the lighting may not have been the best in the church (I presume), but YOU look lovely!
Post # 11
melobean : I had the same reaction when I saw my engagement photos. I cried for a good hour over them. I felt so fat and like there was a magnifying glass on all my imperfections. But I showed them to my Fiance, and he was so happy with how I looked! and then I showed them around more, and people kept ooohing and awwwing over them. I picked my tope 3 to use for the website and Save-The-Date Cards. Loads of unprompted compliments. I realized it was my own insecurity.
You look great in those pictures! And guess what? For most of history, your body type was considered the highest standard of beauty. Very few people people have fit the conventional standard of beuty, and it always changes.
I am going to paraphrase a quote from the great Margaret Cho “If you have such a limited view of beauty, then I feel bad for you, because you must not see much beauty in the world”. So I have a challenge for you. Every day, when you look in the mirror, find one thing you love about your body. Repeat that to yourself 10 times. Try to pick something different every day. That helped me get over my feeling that my Fiance was too good looking for me.
We are our own worst critic. You look like a beautiful bride. I’m sure, in a month or two, you will appreciate them more. You’ll definitely think you look great when you’re an old lady. I look back at pictures from us that mortified me at the time, but then, a few years go by and I realize I looked miles better than I thought I did at the time!
Post # 12
You look gorgeous! Your makeup and dress are flawless and you look so happy, I think the best part of the photo is that your joy shines through.
Post # 13
honeybee69 : I felt moved to tears by this. I look back at pictures from 4 years ago where I thought I was too big and now I think wow I sure did look good. So I’m thinking this will definetly be one of those moments too. I suppose I was just shocked to see all my sides I’ve never seen. I put most of the budget towards video and photos becasue I did anticipate even if I hated them I’d want them later in life.
I really will do this, starting tonight. I want to love the way I look. When I love it I can tell I’m happier and he is too. Your advice I think will make a big difference for the two of us. You put so much thought and care into this I don’t know how to thank you but really just thank you so much
Post # 14
Bee. You have a beautiful face with great bone structure and that first shot is to die for.
the second shot is not lit, and you can barely see you. It’s not a realistic impression of how you look to others. Video is even harsher than photography and so people -all people- look less than their best unless it is lit well. This has nothing to do with weight and everything to do with bad lighting conditions.
All of the people you are comparing yourself to have been lit by professional lighting experts and styled and posed and photoshopped.
look your face. High cheekbones, good nose, pretty eyes, perfect lips, great chin.
You were a beautiful bride!
Post # 15
You must be joking! You look gorgeous! Your smile is just amazing!