(Closed) I feel hijacked by a pregnant friend

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 32
Member
2354 posts
Buzzing bee

@Ari214:  I like the idea of showing your ring at her shower, hehehe. But I think the disappointement is normal in this situation, the event was supposed to be for the two of you. This was your engagement party though, you will probably have a bachelorette too ? This will be the time to have all attention for you. 🙂 

ETA : and nobody can steal attention from you on you your wedding day either !!! Pictures will all be about you. 

Not trying to say you shouldn’t feel hijacked right now, but put it in perspective, I think you have no choice to let it go, but you’ll have plenty of events and pictures and attention all to yourself to come. People like this are being rude and others know it. They’re the ones purposedly making themselves look bad in public. 

Post # 33
Member
690 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@Ari214:  Don’t feel stupid.  It’s a lesson learned for next time.  Every day of your life you will likely have one.  Don’t stress about it.  At least it wasn’t at the weddding or anything.

ETA:  I read Cakey P’s advice.  Sounds like I regurgitated it.  Sorry.  I have a friend who has friends like that, always competing or out for themselves.  Don’t let them treat you like that and if it means taking a break, so be it.

Post # 34
Member
3683 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I have a friend like this – a constant one-upper, likes to be the center of attention, etc.  I suppose the best consolation is that it isn’t personal, this is how some people are.  In the end they aren’t fooling people.

Post # 35
Member
320 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Ari214:  i agree with you. i think she purposely did this, trying to make herself more important. pregnant or not, it wasnt her party. id have moved her ass out of the picture completely. getting engaged/married only happens once (or should) it was especially nasty and in poor taste for her to insert herself like that.

Post # 36
Member
2831 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@Ari214:  My SIL announced her pregnancy (actually, my brother did) at my rehearsal dinner.  I had to photoshop half my wedding pictures because she was cradling her 7-week pregnant belly.  Give me a freaking break.  A year later I finally snapped and yelled at her.  She was telling me AGAIN that she threw up at our wedding.  “I know.”  She’s sorry, it was just the only time she was pregnant sick so it was a big deal (let’s not mention that she kept stealing the candy from the candy bar, and ate crap for breakfast and lunch and it was almost 100deg).  “Well, it was the only time I got married so it was a big fucking deal to me too and I didn’t need to hear about you being pregnant all night.” 

She finally got it.

Post # 40
Member
2831 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@Ari214:  So you see why I was annoyed.  🙂  She was my Maid/Matron of Honor and did basically nothing for me all weekend.  My husband’s best man carried the train of my dress while we were taking pictures. 

To be be super petty, they even got me a gift that was worth less than the dress & shoes I bought for her, and about 1/4 of the gift we got for them when they got married (we both had to travel for the weddings, except we had to pay for our expenses, theirs were covered by work and free lodging with our parents).  Even my mom called him a cheapskate. 

It took a while, but I’m finally over it.  I love my niece – I get her lots of presents.  They get nothing.

My point – people will suck.  Try not to let it ruin your day(s).  It almost did mine, but focus on what’s good and just remember that they have a need to try to get attention because they are less awesome than you.

Post # 42
Member
2831 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@Ari214:  Hahahaha – sounds like my brother!  My Christmas gift has been on its way for almost a year!

Post # 43
Member
4685 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2019 - City, State

@Ari214:  I think  you’re overreacting. Let it go.

Post # 44
Member
764 posts
Busy bee

@Ari214:  That’s a shitty thing for her to do. It is one thing if you all just happened to be hanging out together but this is an event for a special time in YOUR life. Sounds like she just tries to make every situation all about her.

If she can’t stop thinking about herself for 5 seconds to take a picture celebrating with a friend than she is really selfish.

At her baby shower you should have all of your friends checking out your engagement ring in the middle of her photo. (Kidding)

Post # 46
Member
4685 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2019 - City, State

@Ari214:  I don’t believe in “stealing thunder”. If it had been my shower I would have probably made a bigger deal out of her pregnant belly than she did. Im just not that way I guess. Either way, good luck! and i hope you do figure out a way to not let it annoy you anymore. 🙂

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