(Closed) I feel "icky" about the wedding finances

posted 6 years ago in Money
Post # 3
8042 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

What’s done is done. It’s too late to change venue or anything really, right? I wouldn’t beat yourself up over it.

I guess the smart thing would have been to just elope, but if a wedding was a priority for you, who am I to tell you how to spend your money?

Yeah you probably should have saved up all the money beforehand, but there’s no need to be ashamed. Cut out as much as you can in the few months following the wedding so you get that credit card paid down. You won’t start your married life in debt if you’re smart about it. If you say ‘oh screw it’ and start spending like crazy and throw caution to the wind, that would be stupid. Just make sure you pay the card down. You never know what might happen… you might have to get a new roof or travel somewhere for a funeral, or something. Life is expensive. Just work out a payment schedule and stick to it before life starts adding up and unforeseen expenses arise (you should have emergency fund and savings to mitigate those types of things, though).

Post # 4
2065 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Don’t feel ashamed! We ended up doing the same thing. We had a budget of our money and money promised to us by my father. Well, my father ended up getting laid off after all the contracts were signed and I just couldn’t bring myself to let him give us the amount he promised (we only took about half). We ended up putting about $3.5K on a credit card. After the wedding, I transfered it with a 0% interest balance transfer offer to another card and it was paid off very quickly. Shit happens! Don’t beat yourself up. As long as you have a plan to pay it off, it’s not the end of the world.

Post # 5
1064 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Well, i think you have a very healthy mental attitude towards money!!!I think you are exagerating just a little..i mean about feeling bad for being in debt for 3 months after the wedding. I have still to pay the final amount to the photographer – he hasn’t delievered the DVD with the pro pic or our album..GRRRRRR

Post # 6
11272 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2012

3k is a lot to be short. it looks like you’ve done a good job with cutting some corners.  have you looked into these options?

can you change the menu to something less expensive?

the only other way to cut costs is by cutting some of the guest list. have your invites gone out yet?


Post # 8
705 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I totally understand where you are coming from. I set a strict budget and said i would not go over it… no patter what and 9 months from the wedding it looks like we have busted it by 3k as well! At first i was really upset with myself, but we are going through a 2 year plan to minimalize our debt occured (for the wedding, and our own personal debt that we will be joining together) and working towards elliminating that in the future.

Post # 9
1475 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

If you have done absolutely everything you can to cut costs then you have done your best and should be proud of that!

Do not feel ashamed.  It’s you and Fiance special day so if you want to splurge a little bit I see absolutely nothing wrong with that and if you are committed to paying it off in 3 months, in my opinion there is nothing wrong with that either.  Some people go into much much more debt for their weddings.  The fact that you already have an issue with the little debt you will incur speaks volumes of your financial wisdom.  Best wishes to you and stop being so hard on yourself.

ETA: A lot of bees report receiving cash from guests as wedding presents.  Maybe if you get this gift too then you can put it towards paying down your wedding debt.  Just a thought…

Post # 10
456 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Girl! I know how you feel! We are about the same amount short for our big day in late october. and dont have money for our honey moon. Yikes. Makes my stomach sick thinking about finances. But think about it, you are only using 3 grand and 3 months to pay off such an amazing wedding. you have the rest of you lives to enjoy the memories of this special day that will only happen once. Dont cut corners on photography, thats my best advice. And enjoy yourself, dont beat yourself up over it. Many people go to extremes and get 20 grand or more in debt. This is close to rediciulus. You sound like you have been so reasonable so far and you have done an amazing job at cutting corners. Give yourself a pat on the back for pulling that off in this day and age! And move on to happiness and exictement of your fun day to come!!

Post # 12
2692 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Honestly, things happen.  Don’t beat yourself up too much.  You are giiving yourself 3 motnhs to pay off $3000..that is a good plan and if you do it, might help your credit.  What is done is done…just move on and try to enjoy your big day.

With that said, I am praying I won’t come up short.  I am still saving and sticking to my budget so the way things are going, I am thinking it will be fine (barring any emergencies).

Post # 13
341 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

You might also consider that you’ll get some cash gifts for the wedding too! Maybe not a ton since a lot of people are helping you out as their gift but still, you’ll have some extra to pay down the card, right?

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