(Closed) I feel like he doesn't want me :(

posted 5 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 3
Member
2419 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

You say he has anxiety. He should see a doctor. Depression/anxiety can cause intimacy issues. While I understand why you are upset, if it is a health issue, there is really nothing he can do that will help the situation until he sees a doctor.

Post # 4
Member
5965 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

Don’t blame yourself sweetie, and don’t blame your guy…it gets complicated between the sheets and if a man feels like he can’t get er done…well, his self esteem and confidence are blown.

Anxiety in all of it’s forms is a crippling thing, if its performance anxiety, well….he’s most lilkely at he place where he feels like he can’t do it, so why try? You getting angry makes it worse, and more than likely, he abstains from any physical contact because he doesn’t want to tease you AND it might get him worked up for something he’s not sure he can do.

I recommend therapy first, but if you guys can’t afford that….it’s time to take the anger out of the situation, neither of you likes this, but it’s pretty clear that what you are doing now doesn’t work, right?  So calm down, stop fighting over it and set yourselves up to succeed.

Also, take a look at what you are doing, in and out of the bedroom, you may be, intended or not, a part of what’s bothering him and he might be to worried to verbalize that.

It’s funny that as intimate as we are with our guys, they still want to hide certain things.  It will work out, but you both have to work on it, him trying more and you accepting what he gives.

 

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