(Closed) I Feel Like I Fail At Being A Girl…(Maybe A Little Long?)

posted 10 years ago in Beauty
Post # 3
18628 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I know how you feel.  I have long mid-back hair and basically all I do in the morning is brush it.  I couldn’t deal with doing my hair every day when it was short.  It was such a hassle to corral my hair.  One thing I think you need to consider is working with your natural hair texture so that you don’t have to use a lot of products and time to fix it up.

Post # 4
2214 posts
Buzzing bee

I don’t really have much advice except not to brush out curls!  I usually just finger through them to loosen them up, but if I brush them, they turn into big balls of frizz.  I have thick, wavy hair, so I use a Chi straightener to straighten my hair almost everytime I wash my hair.  I break my hair into sections because it’s so thick.  If I tried to straighten it all at once it definitely wouldn’t work.  Everyone’s hair is so different.  It took me a while to figure out what I liked and what worked for me.

Post # 5
3601 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 1992

Learn how to blow dry your hair. Get the person who cuts your hair to teach you.

Post # 6
651 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I think if you go to a good stylist they can recommend a style that will work for your hair type.  A good cut will go a long way to helping you out with styling. I know what you mean though about getting home from the stylist looking great and then never being able to do it the same way.  It’s frustrating but if you get a cut that’s easy to style you should be able to style it close enough.

I agree with blowdrying your hair correctly…most of the time if I blowdry my hair I don’t have to do anything else to it.  I don’t really use any products except biosilk silk therapy and that is only if my stylist gives me a free sample of it.  🙂

Post # 7
272 posts
Helper bee

I second what @helenberrycrunch recommends, blow-drying your hair is easy and will make your hair look “styled” with minimal effort.  Also, YouTube has a lot of instructional videos on doing your hair – I’ve looked up more complicated hairstyles (yeah, um, ratting your hair is not recommended), but I’m sure there are some on the basic ponytail and bun.  Just spend some time with your mirror and a brush and practice, practice, practice.  If your hair is naturally a little wavy, putting it into a bun while damp, letting it dry, and then taking it down without brushing it might give you really nice curls.  If you do learn how to blow-dry your hair, ask them to show you how to do it with a round brush so you can add some shape and smooth out any unwelcome waves. 

No one was born knowing how to do this stuff, some women just learned earlier than others.  So don’t be embarassed!

ETA: I never use any hair products, ever, and I think I have pretty great hair! So just basic blow-drying goes a loong way.

Post # 8
814 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

i’ve got a few years on you, and can’t style my own hair to save my life!

Post # 11
1932 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2008

@kkkatie, I feel like this alllll the time! People always say I have cute hair, but I always think everyone else can style their hair so much better!

I agree, don’t brush curls – I have curly hair and will not let anyone play with them, or they’ll frizz out! Maybe what your SIL meant was to use a pick comb? My mom does that with her curls. I would suggest, if you curl, to just lightly spray with hair spray, and comb your fingers through to loosen them up.

Also, I say invest in a good salon – get recommendations from some of your friends, and then tell the stylist your dilemma. Just say, I don’t know what to do with my hair, I want something easy, but stylish, I have no idea what works for me. I promise they’ll help (and if not they’re not good stylists or worth your money!)

Also, as for blow drying – that is huge! Try using a round brush, start at the base of your hair and pull out, while twisting the brush, and pointing the hair dryer at a down-ward angle on your hair, you will get a full-blown volume look, with slightly curled edges. If that makes sense, that’s another thing you could ask your stylist how to do, my stylist showed me how to do with with my curls and it’s amazing!

Post # 12
814 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

that’s what i’m hear for!

Post # 13
7770 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

I am not a girly-girl at all!  I just started really trying, for the wedding.  I started with a good trim at an Aveda salon.  I also take extra care to be gentle to my hair, to avoid split ends- but get a trim every couple months.  When you put curlers in your hair- try a product like Aveda’s Be Curly- it works great for my hair- because I HATE hairspray.  Rub some in your hand, smooth the cream onto the strand of hair before using the curler.  When you take them out, they will have a soft, tamed hold.  You don’t have to touch them after that, just let them fall naturally.  Also, I always air dry my hair- less damage in the long run.  It looks kinda frizzy untill it is all the way dry, but I just keep it pulled back if it is bothering me.  Invest in some good organic shampoo and conditioner- like Giovanni, or John Masters Organics.  Anything with Jojoba Oil in it is really good for you hair.  Also, get a natural boar brush and on the day you don’t wash your hair, brush your natural oils through it.  Sounds funky, but it is great for your hair.

Post # 15
175 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Also, battle frizzies with a leave-in conditioner applied to wet hair, and a small amount of a nonscented lotion (I use St. ives) after blowdrying. 

Post # 16
100 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Ok I am the girliest girl ever…

I have interesting hair. It is really curly, but also pretty easy to blow out straight. When people see me with my naturally curly hair they always ask if I sat there with a curling iron and did it! HA right.

Here are my suggestions…

If you are going to blow dry your hair, start with a “Smoothing” shampoo and conditioner in the shower. Doesn’t have to be expensive, the Herbal Essences one is great. In my opinion, avoid Pantene products like the plague, they slowly coat your hair in wax. Yes, actual wax. So your hair will be shiny for awhile, then start to look dull because it is covered in, well, wax. When you use your conditioner, apply it only to the ends of your hair, not the roots, so you get more lift and body.

Towel dry your hair by squeezing, not rubbing, rubbing can mess with your hair’s follicle and make it frizzy. Then apply just a smidge of serum like Biosilk, which is expensive but the BEST. It will make it much easier to blow dry your hair smooth. 

Depending on how much hair you have, grab some claw clips and separate your hair into top layer, middle layer, and bottom layer. Start drying on the bottom, going section by section with a round boar bristle brush, pointing the dryer down the shaft of your hair. This is really important to get a smooth look. Work from bottom to top, taking down one section at a time to dry. Once it is dry, run the straightener through any frizzy parts, and use a bit more of the biosilk (like 3 drops, not much or your hair will look oily!) to smooth and shine!

On another note, if you put curlers in your hair, like some of the other girls said, only use your fingers to brush it out just a bit (it helps if I flip my head over) just to separate. Hope this helps!

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