(Closed) I feel like I'll never "get around" to having kids :/

posted 7 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 48
Member
164 posts
Blushing bee

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@Mrs. Eagle:  Totally agree!

 

I waited till I finished my PhD to start TTC. I was 31 when we started TTC. It took us another year to get pregnant, which I did not expect but that’s life. I wish I started earlier, jobs come and go but your fertility is only good for some time. It took me a year or two longer to finish my PhD than I expected, hence my timeline was pushed up. Now I’m probably gonna be 34-35 when we try for child number 2. That makes me worried, since it took us some time with the first one.

 

I think you still have a few years before you really have to start to worry, but I would not wait till you are “established” to start TTC. You never know how long it will take. Plus, a lot of my fellow students had their babies during the last couple of years of writing their thesis when the demands of school are less and you have more flexible timing.

 

Its good you are thinking about this at 26, you are ahead of the game already. Good luck with your PhD!

 

Post # 50
Bee
341 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

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@FutureDrAtkins:  are you me? seriously, I think we might be in the same field. we should talk.

I don’t think there is ever a good time to have children in academia, and it’s definitely something that I’ve been struggling with.  It doesn’t help that PBear and I are both getting degrees on different schedules.  I grew up always thinking it was marriage, house, and then children, but we probably won’t settle down in one location/get established into our fields for the next decade or so and I’m not sure I want to wait that long.  I want to be more established and settled, but I just don’t see how that can possibly happen. Furthermore, I have always thought I’d want to stay home with the kids for a few years when they’re younger but I’m having a hard time justifying that when I’ve worked so hard for my degree.  No advice, just sympathies.

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