(Closed) I feel pressure to be pregnant but I’m not sure what I want.

posted 8 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
Member
393 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

if your not sure you shouldn’t do it. Children take up so much of your time. Unless you want someone else to raise your children (aka daycare), forget starting up your own business! I love my kids to death, but i don’t have time to myself, i don’t have time to work a “real job”, and time for you and your hubby is gone!

I hated how my parents did raise me, aka they left me when i was 3 months old and i grew up with my grandparents, and i raise my kids nothing like my parents. if you hate the parents they were, you can raise your kid better!!

Just my two cents.

Post # 5
Member
393 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

well the pain and hospital part doesn’t last that long and this is coming from someone who absolutely hates hates hates being pregnant. i had so many issues, and went to the hospital a stupid amount of times, and its a shitty memory now. i definitely haven’t forgotten! i’ve been told i’m also that .0000001% who gets really scrwed with things, lol.

Post # 7
Member
393 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

lol well people say you forget the pain and all that shit, its not true, you do remember. But it does end! I hated needles, but got completely used to them, i lost count at like  100 needles, haha. but like i said, i am that .0000001%…..

The hospitals aren’t THAT bad,  and the OBGYN’s aren’t too horrible, but if you do have kids, really really research your doc! i had a shitty doc the first time around.

I stay home with the kids, mainly for monetary issues. If i didn’t stay home, i’d only pay for daycare, i wouldn’t really make a dent in our income. But I dont’ like daycares either! But when both my boys are in kindergarten i will start with a part time job, and be able to work myself into fulltime, lol.

If your career is THAT important to you, i’d say wait.

Post # 9
Member
1023 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Where is the pressure coming from? Your family? Your hubs? Your friends? Yourself? If you’re not ready you’re not ready. Whether its because you want to start a business or aren’t ready for the health care aspect of it, or whatever.

Post # 10
Member
5823 posts
Bee Keeper

My Darling Husband says that no one is ever ready for a child.  There is ALWAYS something else to do or more things you want to accomplish, or more money you want to save.  In the end, they don’t need much just a mother.  You’ll be fine either way you decide!

Post # 11
Member
429 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2008

If the doctors/healthcare aspect of it freaks you out, you might want to consider a midwife for your pregnancy. Research what’s legal in your area (not all types of midwives are approved in each state), but they can be a lot more accessible in terms of helping you understand the ins and outs of pregnancy and the things that they want to watch for. Mrs. Avocado is seeing a midwife, and it seems like she takes a lot of time to help her understand what’s going on, not just a quick 10 minute, “Hi, how are you, how’s baby, ok bye!” that a lot of doctors do.

No offense to doctors, of course, mine was great, but that was definitely all he had time for at each appointment. And you can get some nasty midwives too, of course.

But that sounds like it’s not the biggest thing holding you back. Take more time to figure yourself out before you commit to kids. Yeah, you get to spend a lot of time together, but at least in my case, there are plenty of times where I’m sitting there with my baby, and she’s only happy if I’m letting her dance on my stomach, thinking “Please, please please can you just go to sleep so I can have some time alone for 30 minutes.” I love her so much, but it’s tough.

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