- 8 years ago
- Wedding: September 2011
For acting like a byotch to SO sometimes but my temper and moodiness just get the best of me. 🙁 I get really pissed about small stuff and it just builds up.
Today I wasn’t really in a great mood to begin with because my tooth was really hurting (I have an abcessed tooth that’s getting a root canal Monday) and I couldn’t get the pain to stop regardless of medicine and ice packs. It started out when SO wouldn’t talk to me about curtains for the living room. We have very outdated vertical blinds and he just refuses to listen to ideas about window treatments because “the vertical blinds are very expensive” (and were in the house when we bought it). That’s usually his response to most redecorating ideas… But that’s not even really the issue. It’s him completely shutting me down without even thinking about listening.
So that just made me even more grumpy. Later in the day, his “friend” (previous homeowner) comes over with his nephew to say happy new year. Um, okay, whatever. I strongly dislike the previous homeowner because he always pops in, uninvited, without calling, “just to say hello”, often staying for dinner, also without invitation. He also tries very very hard to stir up conflict between SO and I. Today, SO and this guy were talking about how the kitchen sink is acting up. SO goes to the basement to grab a tool or something and I’m passing through to grab my purse because it’s sitting on the kitchen counter. He makes a comment like “Isn’t owning a home fucking awful?” (He cusses like a sailor in front of me) I kind of gape at him and say something along the lines of “Um, I mean, not really.” And get the heck outta dodge because I’m not his biggest fan at allll.
Later, SO was like “He said you snapped at him while you were in the kitchen, that he was trying to make small talk and you just snapped at him.” That’s what I mean by stir the pot. This leads SO to say that I shouldn’t be so rude, the guy is just trying to be nice… I think he’s trying to stir the pot.
I just don’t deal well with this stuff. It just makes me angry and talking to SO about it doesn’t really seem to fix things because I don’t have a solution. He always comes back to a topic like the redecorating once he’s gotten used to the idea and we compromise, which turns out really nicely. But it’s the path to that that’s frustrating because I feel like I’m pouty and rotten to him.
And I don’t have a solution to dealing with this friend/previous homeowner. SO and I have talked about the guy and how I think he’s an awful creeper but SO seems to enjoy having someone to talk tools and projects with. But the guy is awful and I end up being pouty and rotten when he shows up (unannounced, uninvited) at my house.
SO gets to deal with me being rotten and pouty like a 4 year old and then long talks about it. We just can’t come up with a solution to the fact that he is friends with someone I hate.
Any advice? Anyone else every feel like they’re mean to their SO/FI/DH and seriously regret it?