(Closed) I feel…strange (Sorry, it’s long)

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
82 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

Wow. That is really tough and I’m sorry that you have to deal with that. It seems like you are doing your best to put the intrests of you and your fiance first while trying to understand his family’s thoughts. I think that you are just going to have to take everything with a grain of salt, especially the having children thing. Good luck with it all, and know you are doing what you can.

Post # 4
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I’m sorry you are having differences with them.  I think you just need to ignore the way that they talk about you, in some people’s eyes you will always do things the wrong way and there isn’t anything you can do about it.  I’m about your age and I couldn’t truly imagine having kids right now with being in school and starting my career.  Stay strong and it sounds like your hubby to be understands what you want too!

Post # 5
230 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Stick with your guns!  You are still young and have plenty of time to have kids.  Seems like you’ve got a good head on your shoulders and a solid plan.  Don’t let their hopes and expectations derail you.  And don’t stress the differences.  My family, and my fiance’s family could not be more different, but as long as I’m mindful of those differences and censor myself appropriately everything is fine. 

My fiance and I have decided that we are not having children because travel is more important to us, and we STILL hear all about what great parents we would be, and why aren’t we having kids, and it just doesn’t make sense, etc, etc, etc.  However, we’ve spent many nights in conversation discussing our values, and what is important to us, and we just didn’t see kids fitting in to that.  Its tough to explain to other people, but its our decision and we’re happy with it.  Feel confident in the decisions you’ve made with your fiance, and don’t let anyone else make you feel bad about it.

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