(Closed) I genuinely can't fake my reactions, and I hope I don't hurt people

posted 7 years ago in Weddingbee
  • poll: Do you like brutal honesty?

    I LOVE honesty! It never offends me if it's coming from a kind place

    I appreciate honesty, but sometimes it hurts

    I'm indifferent, general personality matters more than honesty/lying

    I'd rather hear the positives, skip the negatives

    I prefer people to spare my feelings if it's something I can't change

    Kindly fib to me - I appreciate my life choices being affirmed

  • Post # 107
    592 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    View original reply
    @KhaleesiStormborn:  If someone asks your opinion about something like a ring they should be prepared that not everyone is going to like it. I prefer that people are honest and just say no I don’t like it, that doesn’t offend me because they don’t have to wear it, I do. That said I think you can be honest about not liking things without making faces. 

    Post # 110
    522 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 2014

    View original reply
    @KhaleesiStormborn:  Just keep practicing. I just think that I would appreciate your attempt at a poker face more than I would appreciate the way you try to phrase things to make them less offensive.

    Post # 115
    3770 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 1999

    If you can pull yourself together at work, surely you can do the same outside of work.

    Post # 116
    273 posts
    Helper bee

    I just think that if everyone else on the planet manages to “fake their reactions”, you can too. Try harder.

    Yes, I would be offended if you didn’t comment on my ring when I showed you, or you had an ‘uncontrollable’ negative reaction. I’ve never met someone who couldn’t pretend to be happy for someone- except people who plain don’t care or are being malicious- so I wouldn’t be placated by an ‘I couldn’t help it” because imo you can.

    Post # 118
    13658 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    All babies, rings, and wedding dresses are beautiful, by definition, since they symbolize the sentiments and happiness of the couple.  Would it help to to look at things that way?  

    IMO you have to develop the ability to tell the difference between a rhetorical question and one where real input or constructive advice  is desired.  My fallback on a written forum is the latter, and in real life I can usually tell by body language, expression, tone of voice and other signals   that it’s the former.  

    But if someone asked out of excitement and was  answered the way you describe, then I would consider that tactless and hurtful, yes. 


    Post # 120
    178 posts
    Blushing bee

    View original reply
    @DW82:  +10


    If I showed you my ring and you told me it wasn’t your taste, I’d be like shut up and admire my ring. To quote big bang theory, “It is a non-optional social convention”

    The topic ‘I genuinely can't fake my reactions, and I hope I don't hurt people’ is closed to new replies.

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