(Closed) I got my first “bridezilla” today

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1897 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

Wow that sucks and seems so…inappropriate!  You sound like you were so accomodating!  I have not yet been called one, but I’m sure it’ll happen at some point.  I have met a bunch of bridezillas though…

Post # 4
Member
485 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

That doesn’t sound bridezilla-ey at all to me!!

I think that you should be allowed to express what you want for your wedding without having to censor yourself because people will call you a bridezilla.

I haven’t been dealt the bridezilla card yet. I’m kind of keeping quiet to avoid confrontation.

Post # 5
Member
2781 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Yes, and mostly by people who aren’t married or are very much against marriage. I think a lot of the stereotype comes from ignorance. I’d write them a sweet email back saying that you’re sorry if they thought you came off that way but that you think you’re being very reasonable and just letting them know how you feel about certain things (like the bachelorette and the shower) and then leave it.

I’m sorry they saddled you with a label!

Post # 6
Member
1209 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

It sounds like you are being SUPER easygoing, actually one of the most easygoing brides ever! Not sure quite sure why the thought of “bridezilla” would have even entered their mind! For the record- I hate the term bridezilla as well!

Post # 7
Member
1260 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

How annoying! Espeically where you were being so accomodating. Not only that, it lets them know what to do, so they aren’t guessing half the time, unlike several weddings I have been in, where we were just EXPECTED to know what the bride wanted. Ugh. I haven’t got the bridezilla label yet, but my parents and future in-laws have sometimes remarked “oh, you don’t need to know the details of that yet, why are you thinking of that now???” and it drives me bonkers. I want to be as minimally stressed as possible – so there is nothing wrong with taking care of details early and being straightforward about what you do and do not want.

 

Post # 9
Member
3125 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

You seemed helpful to me! maybe b/c you put it in one long email?  Don’t sweat it. I’ve seen bridezillas and you’re not it. ๐Ÿ˜‰

Post # 10
Member
2000 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

I’ve been called bridezilla but only in a kidding way, I’ve never really taken it too personal but I can completely understand why you would. It can be personal sometimes but don’t let it get to you. You’re certainly allowed to be bridezilla since it’s your day!!

But I do agree with the other posters, as far as I’m concerned you def. seem easy going! I definitely wanted a bridal shower but I’m right there with you on the bachelorette party. LOL sorry they called you that girl..just let them know it’s a touchy name with you & if they’re your friends they should totally respect that!

Post # 11
Member
166 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I agree that it sounds like you are being anti-bridezilla–you’re letting them know that you’d rather have something low-key for the shower/bachelorette, which is by definition not-bridezilla, and you’re letting them pick their own dresses and hair/makeup!!! That is the antithesis of being bridezilla!

My mom and dad keep calling me bridezilla because I do things like, you know, research cake bakers and photographers, and I think it’s because a) they don’t really know what the term means and just think it sounds funny  and b) my sister didn’t really do anything for her wedding, just sort of hired a bunch of random vendors, so they’re not used to the idea of having your s–t together. I really hate that this term gets applied to women who are not being bitchy in the least and are just getting stuff done–it seems really sexist to me.

Post # 12
Member
6661 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

I called my older sister Zil for short in the last few months before her wedding. I’d say “No problem, Zil I’ll get the alcohol for the limo exactly to your specifics!” But I was just joking adn I completely understood the difference between giving everyone information and wanting things to be done correctly to stressing everyone out and making unreasonable demands.

I’d just ignore them or give them a wink reply ๐Ÿ˜‰ b/c your email was nice and non-demanding and informational. It is waaay more annoying when a bride gives NO information about what she wants. It was so awkward when my friend woudln’t tell us when we had to arrive, what time hair and makeup was, when pictures were, how she wanted us to wear our hair, etc. ALL things we needed to know! And my Fiance was traveling to a foreign city by himself having NO information about the schedule for the wedding. I felt so bad.

Post # 13
Member
2634 posts
Sugar bee

Awwww – that sucks!  FWIW – I don’t think you’re being a zilla at all.  (((hugs)))

Post # 14
Member
1638 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I always get called a bridezilla when I have a strong opinion about MY wedding by my mom AND sister.

My mom does it because my idea of our wedding is not 100% traditional and so therefore I am a bridezilla.

My sister calls me a bridezilla because I REFUSE to let the BM’s have a dress with pickups on it. My dress has no pickups, my sister wants to have freaking Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses that are all southern belle. That style is FINE but not in MY wedding, it has nothing to do with our fall theme and I just honestly don’t like the style. I’ve told her that a million times before, so what does she do on Saturday when we tried on dresses? Picked out and tried on a dress that was bigger than mine with pickups. Of course everyone said she looked great in it, which she did but I was the Bridezilla because I said no immediately. It just wasn’t in my wedding vision at all.

Post # 15
Member
1638 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I also think that people who have never planned a wedding have no idea of the stress we are under from parents, deadlines and just daily life so if you snap a bit at them because god forbid you don’t want a head table or a dress with pickups you are categorized as bridezilla. I can’t wait for my sister to get married and have all the stress that I have from my mother and FI’s mother. Oh it will be glorious so she knows how I feel right now!

Post # 16
Member
2015 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Ugh, I agree, I HATE the word bridezilla! I blame that stupid show on WE. I was called the b-word on several occasions, and my husband (then FI) would get so mad and defend me and say, “She’s actually a really laid-back bride who just wants to make sure she’s getting what she pays for!” It was nice to hear that ๐Ÿ™‚

Gosh, it’s like, brides who simply want to ensure a nice day for everyone are automatically b-zillas!

 

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