(Closed) I guess I am going to have to grin and bear this

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
4 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Just about every wedding in the past few years I’ve been to have had MOB’s in black dresses. Black is timeless, elegant and it especially fits in well since that’s what your bridesmaids are wearing. The no black rule is extremely outdated and you shouldn’t worry!

Post # 4
Member
313 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I don’t think it’s such a big deal, but I forbid my mother and his mother to wear black…. in a nice way of course. I compromised by allowing them to wear shades of gray if they want, but the whole mourning look on a mom bothers me.

Post # 5
Member
4419 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

@BrideToBrit:  I think it’s okay for her to wear black, especially since your wedding party is wear it.  Since your wedding is in September (on my birthday!) maybe you could get her a pashmina in a beautiful color that she could wear with it or some beautiful jewelry to wear with it.  But black is classic and elegant, so even without a pashmina, she will look lovely. 

Post # 6
Member
390 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

@BrideToBrit: Poor thing. At 73 years old, I wouldn’t make a big deal. Normally black is worn when the MOB doesn’t agree with the marriage, but you know that she just couldn’t find anything else. I’m sure that will be a funny story for you to tell someday. Perhaps dress it up with some colorful jewelry?

Post # 7
Member
464 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

My mom was going to wear black, but instead decided on navy??? my colors are red balck and ivory, and Father-In-Law is wearing black, so honesty I would prefer black than navy.

Post # 10
Member
1830 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Black is definitely fine – my mom wore black to my sister’s wedding, and funny enough, the MOG wore the EXACT same dress.  Ok, that part wasn’t planned obviously, but it just goes to show that mothers wearing black at a wedding is perfectly acceptable and not a sign of mourning.  It may have been tradition to not wear black but as with so many other traditions, I think it has become rather obscure.   

If you want your mom to spice it up a bit, perhaps she can get some sparkly jewerly to make it appear more festive.  With my mom’s dress mentioned above, the jacket and neckline were rimmed with rhinestones which definitely did not suggest a mourning outfit.   Trust me, it will be fine and I guarantee, no one else will think a thing about it!   🙂

Post # 11
Member
199 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

My first thought was “of course it’s fine.” You’re right about the pictures. It will look wonderful. Some pretty jewlery and a pashmina that matches your wedding colors and she’ll be amazing.

EDIT: I saw you asked what a pashmina was–it’s more or less a wrap or shawl, usually a pretty long rectangle. Technically, they have to be made of the wool of a certain type of goat that is bred in the Himalayas, but people seem to use the term to generally refer to the style of wrap 

Post # 12
Member
351 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

She’ll love lovely in black!

Post # 14
Member
1199 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

@BrideToBrit: I just had this conversation with my mom last night.  Black is one of my colors (BMs in a raspberry dress) so I didn’t have a problem with my mom or Future Mother-In-Law wearing black.  As PPs have said, its classic, timeless and elegant.

Plus people feel its flattering and makes them feel good which is how I want everyone to feel at my wedding!

Post # 15
Member
464 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

you can get pashminas really inexpensive on ebay, but would need to stick to a US seller to get it on time. I have used this seller for mu Bridesmaid or Best Man gifts, and they are BEAUTIFUL!

Pashmina in white

Post # 16
Member
1489 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@BrideToBrit: I think the black is alright since your wedding party is wearing that color. I agree  with weeonebride in saying get her a colored Pashmina to go with it and maybe some colored jewerly.

 

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