(Closed) I guess you really were chubby….. (Long Post)

posted 8 years ago in Fitness
Post # 3
7286 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’ve been there! I was a tall and chubby kid and when I finally took charge and “thinned” out, everyone ravished me with how good I looked, and “better” and all that crap-basically I read it as: You were fat and ugly before, and now that you are thinner, your desirable and pretty.

Just put all your frusteration and emotion into thinking more positively about your self and let it fuel your goals! So great you have a supportive FH!

Post # 4
1893 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I feel for you! I went from 160 to 120 and felt amazing, then one thing after another, and i somehow got back up to 150. and no matter what i do, i cant keep any weight off… but then again i have no motivation. If you havent donated all those clothes yet, keep ONE outfit that doesnt fit, so it can be your goal. thats what i did with my “skinny jeans”. im hoping i can get into them again. Dont beat yourself up tho. stress sucks when it comes to weight. Those comments also i dont think werent meant to be hurtful, but more of ” wow i thought you were thin before, but now that you have lost weight…” also screw what people say. people are cruel and heartless!

KEEP YOUR HEAD UP, try to stay motivated and stick to WW. IT REALLY DOES WORK!

Post # 5
796 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

I haven’t been in your position before but I have some advice…

You eat more because you’re stressed, and then eating more stresses you out.  So, stop eating that much!  If you’re craving something sweet, have some strawberries or other yummy fruits.  I usually reward myself with one small treat every day.  Maybe a small slice of cake, or a bag of M&M’s.  If I’m tempted to eat junk later in the day I remind myself that I’ve already had my treat, and I can wait until tomorrow to have another. Also, get back into Weight Watchers.  Your motivation? You know you can do it because you have before.  And when you feel like stuffing your face (I get that feeling all the time) think about how great you felt about yourself when you were slimmer.  Imagine being able to feel that great every single day! Is what you want to eat that second really worth giving up the feeling of loving your own body, and being proud of it?  How about the confidence that comes with knowing you look amazing?

You can do it.  I know you can Laughing

Post # 6
7172 posts
Busy Beekeeper

My biggest advice is to (try) to stop putting so much weight on people’s comments.  Think about it from a wedding planningg perspective – sometimes people say the dumbest/hurtful, but most ‘well-meaning’ comments – and mostly it’s to fill silence with what they think is polite  conversation.

For me, loving myself at my current size was the place to start. Understanding that by making better food choices, not giving in to food binges (still happens, working to understand the “WHY” behind it and stop triggers (mostly alcohol for me) before they start), and getting back ON the wagon the very next day (vs a week or month of – meh, who cares, I already messed up), were all things that would help ME love myself.  The only person who can take care of you is you, when it comes to your physcial body.  

Remind yourself that your are wonderful (just look at your adoring Fiance, if you have trouble with that!) and make choices every day to be your best and healthiest self for YOU and your Fiance and the life you are creating together.

For stress eating, if you know what triggers your eating, see if you can come up with a replacement activity – ie:  instead of grabbing the ‘x’ food, have 3 things you do first:  1) drink 16 oz of water, brush your teeth, jump up and down, scream, go for a walk, do deep breathing – some combination of OTHER behaviors that can take your mind off your learned urge to satiate your stomach.

Stress also produces cortisol in the body which can be a biological factor related to your eating…. so, know that it IS difficult to train your body to do something different, but you CAN do it!!!!   

Post # 8
7 posts
  • Wedding: April 2013

I’m so sorry to hear that, I think the problem is that you don’t feel good with yourself, when we aren’t happy with our bodies and feel weak and stress every comment affect us. You should not care about what people says, there is the kind of people who really feel happy for u and there is the kind of people who just enjoy to bring people down is in their nature, sometimes they even do it without notice it . My recomendation to you is to find that motivation to loose weight, and loose weight for the right reasons which should be to have a healthy life style for your health not to fit in smaller clothes, think about your future children and a healthy life style for them. Make a food journal and exersice 3 days a week even if it walk with your husband. And eat right, it is not easy but at the end its worth it. You will feel good about ur appearence, your skin will be better, even your stools will smell different and you will be stronger. AT the end of the day you will go to sleep with the person that makes you happy. And the people who told u you were chubby are probably unhappy.

Post # 9
6255 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2014

I have the problem with food=reward too. One thing that’s helped is this: I printed it out and taped it to my fridge.

Another thing that’s helped me is the South Beach diet. I can’t do Weight Watchers long term, I just stay too hungry. On South Beach, I can eat as much food as I want, as long as I limit it to good choices.

You’ve been through so much. I firmly believe that each person is allotted a set amount of “give a shit” points, and yours have all been assigned to much more important things lately. You haven’t had any left for weight loss, and that’s ok. Putting all one’s strength and effort into just getting through the day in tough times is just fine–in the short term.

In the long term, you were able to lose it before, so you should be able to lose it again. Just be realistic and healthy about your choices, and don’t get discouraged. You’re still ten pounds lighter than where you started, so you even have a 10lb head start this time.

Post # 11
1423 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

Cognitive behavior therapy is also really helpful for stress and self-esteem issues (maybe these are your problems and not really food?).  It’s can help you to recognize when and how you are being unkind to yourself and to deal with stress in more constructive ways.  It might be worth checking out — either a therapist or even just read a book or two — the techniques are easy to learn and put into practice.  It helped me.

Post # 14
2776 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I have lost and gained weight 3 times.  The first time I was in high school and got down to 135 from 150, this was due to stress with a bad boyfriend, I looked awful like a skeleton never want to be like that again, after I left him my weight shot up.  The next two times were in college.  I balloned up to 167 and got mad at myself then I went down to 153 motivated myself by booking a Spring Break to California, I had a blast!  That time I went from a size 14 to an 8. (Like you I got rid of all the 135 clothes and kept some I fit into at the 145 mark which was way more attainable.)

After the second weight loss a series of bad things happened to me and I went up in weight to again and then stopped eating due to stress and went down to 146 pounds and from a size 14 to a 6.  I kept the size 6 pants even though I will probably never fit into them again.  My mom said things like you should never be a size 6.  I just figured I my weight loss would not stick so I ate and ate and ate.  Five months later I was up to 170’s, I looked awful in my graduation pictures.  I kind of just gave up at that point and it wasn’t until last December when I went clothes shopping that I realized I had to do something.  I was barely fitting into size 16 pants and I was tipping the scale at 180!  Unheard of for me.  I signed up for one of those New Year’s Resolution specials and went to the gym twice a week in January and then I hurt my damn hip on the treadmill.  I got to 167.

From Jan til June I shot back up to the 170’s I was bummed.  But my hip feels better now and I am taking control of my eating again finally.  Lately I was binging everytime the scale said a weight below 167 and I had no idea why.  Last week I hit 166 and binged a little but the scale still says 166, so now I just have decided to make an effort.

I started a habit of not drinking more than 2 beers in a sitting if we are out, at home I drink water, tea, or coffee (all have no calories except for anything you add to it.)  I keep a brick of good chocolate, semi-sweets and cookies (which I allow myself one serving size of) and I munch on that when I get a craving.  I know I will have a craving and that’s okay but its not okay to blow a whole day’s worth of calories on it.

I know you did weight watchers but I would suggest you portion things off into serving sizes, so you know your eating more than one and that can help stop you.  Have a real goal at the end not just a number.  For me this time the goal is maintance since I’ve lost weight but never maintaned a loss for more than a few months.

When I lost weight the second did I did it with a nutrionist, and she gave me a food diary that really helped, you wrote down everybite had a goal in the back and there was a column split for how full you felt before and after the meal.  I have it saved on my hardrive and may print myself a few copies to have on hand.  I used to write in there and then record it on fatsecret.  

She also gave me a sheet that had a realistic how many servings of something you should eat, and at that time which really helped me learn how to fuel my body and not feel deprived.  Excercise alone can make you feel really good.  I know it does for me everytime especially swimming.

As far as books I know there is one called small steps big changes or something of the like and I have used that a few times.  It really helped me not feel overwhelmed.  

This time when I lose weight I hope to keep it off, I really don’t want to have to do this a fifth time unless I have a baby.  Maitanence has been key and has made me less and less afraid to charge on in this journey.  I know that was a long winded post but hopefully some of time has helped.  I wish you the best of luck.


Post # 15
3667 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

If you did it once, you can do it again!

I am on Weight Watchers. I’m often tempted to reward myself with food, but instead I created a reward system of non-food items. The key is to make the rewards something you wouldn’t normally do for yourself so that you look forward to them, such as mani/pedis, spa trip or evening of relaxing at home, new workout gear, etc. My most recent reward to myself was a Diamond Candle 🙂

I reward myself every 10 pounds, but some people do every 5. Customize it to whatever motivates you! Check out this thread for support: http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/any-weight-watchers-bees-1

Post # 16
1423 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

View original reply
@nessa9116:  Sure!  I haven’t read this one in particular, but it seems to address your issues perfectly, and the series it is in is good: 


I have read this one, and can personally recommend it:


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