Post # 1
Around a co-worker since I got engaged. I’ve known her for awhile, we work in the same small office. But I don’t think I want to invite her to the wedding. I’m leaving those type of people (the one’s I’m not THAT close with) out.. to keep the costs down. However, she was invited to my sister’s (who works here too) Sept. 08 wedding. I feel bad not inviting her so I purposefully have avoided any talk of my wedding around her.
Then it happened. Today she asked when our wedding was, if it is going to be big or small, etc. I was caught off guard but studdered it would be pretty small, just close family & friends, even though we have 135 invited. I knew she pretty much got the hint she wasn’t invited.
Why do I feel so guilty about not inviting her? Has anyone else had this problem?
Post # 3
I had that happen to me as well. I just told people we have alot more family (which was true) coming to town then we had previously expected. I just left it at that. I think they got the hint that they were not invited and if they did care they did not let me know. There is a line that has to be drawn when inviting people and working on a budget you can’t feel bad!! I would not worry!! You did the right thing.
Post # 4
That’s tough! I am really worried about having to deal with these situations! I am not so good at playing hard ball.. I’m a softy. I am already realizing people that I never would have invited will probably have to be invited! Yikes!
That’s really great that you stood your ground! It’s a tough thing to do, but if you aren’t close to her then she shouldn’t be there. And telling her it’s just going to be close family and friends was the nicest possible way to tell her.
Post # 5
I think you handled it ok for being caught offguard. I’d recommend having a standard answer for all those not invited who bring it up. My answer is: "We’d really love to invite everyone but our venue won’t hold all of our family and friends!" That seems to give the impression that I would love to invite them, no it isn’t a money issue, yes I have all my family coming, and it’s simply a logistics issue. I haven’t seen any sour faces using that one, I’d try that.
Post # 7
I also think you handled it pretty well! It is a tough situation, but anyone who has been through the wedding process should understand the amount of money involved and the over-all stress involved!
Post # 8
Ugg, unfortunately, your situation was particularly difficult because your sister works there and invited this woman to her wedding. What can you do? I like Mighty’s response.