(Closed) I hate finding out too late that a word/phrase is actually racist :-(

posted 8 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 243
Member
9950 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

TO – Mrs_Amanda:  No problemo… I figured as much (you on the phone), it wasn’t that difficult to read without additional spacing.

And more importantly… it was a GREAT Read.  Like the others I am enjoying the wonderful thought provoking ideas that Bees are contributing.

PS… I hear you on “not making waves”… but I can tell you that if any of that derogatory language was being used say at work (even in jest)… I’d be at HR so fast filing a complaint.  The terms might not be a whole lot about yourself personally (although technically they are about you as you are the “minority” in having moved from Louisiana), but more than anything else they are most certainly not appropriate for the workplace.

 

Post # 244
Member
5217 posts
Bee Keeper

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@iarebridezilla:  Absolutely. I want to reiterate that INTENTIONAL racist remarks is what my post/rant was more directed towards and then your reaction. 

Post # 245
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5217 posts
Bee Keeper

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@This Time Round:  I agree, time and place definitely matter! If it was a work related remark, that would sway my reaction over some comment made by an aquaintance.

Post # 246
Member
11231 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

I’m learning a lot from this thread.

I’m reading through that site with the list of racial slurs and very surprised at some of them (and I love that some of the descriptions say “not derogatory;” isn’t that the point of the list?). I’ve never even heard of most of these/would see these as descriptive terms or just plain old words. Some of them are just direct translations of words, ffs! Obviously it depends on the context, but who the hell is going to call an Armenian person an “Ararat” as a derogatory term? WTF does that even mean? 

Post # 247
Member
2095 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

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@SoupyCat:  This discussion reminds me of the recent story about how a sports writer used the phrase “a chink in his armor” when discussing Jeremy Lin of the Knicks. A lot of people got pissed off, but it was clear the writer didn’t mean anything racist by it.

This is the kind of thing that upsets me. That phrase has been around forever. Why on earth would someone now think it has a racist connotation? I had not heard about this. But people really got upset by this? Is no literary phrase sacred anymore?

Post # 248
Member
9916 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

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@StormyRose:  Because they used it because Lin is Chinese.  They certainly did mean something by it.

Post # 249
Member
2695 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I like this website: Yo, Is This Racist?

I absolutely think it is everyone’s responsibility to speak up against the use of racist phrases or slurs–especially if you are NOT from the ethnic group to whom it is offensive.  (In a nice way if its a mistake, by calling someone an asshole if they did it intentionally. Smile ) People like that need to know that no, I’m not on your side because we share the same skin tone. No, its not ever okay to say things like that–regardless of who your company is.

Post # 251
Member
2605 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

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@This Time Round:  Interesting… now we know where one of the approximately 17 “Republican equivalent” far right Tories ended up. 🙂

(For you non-Canadians… what we consider conservative politically in this country pales in comparison to yours.  We have a very left lean).

Post # 252
Member
5089 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

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@Mrs_Amanda:  I respectfully disagree. I think it’s really important NOT to let intentionally racist (or homophobic, or sexist) remarks slide. Doing so reinforces to the speaker that it’s socially acceptable to express racism, as long as you’re not doing it to the target of the slur.

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@Roe:  Oh I was hoping someone would link that. 😀

 

Post # 253
Member
5089 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

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@Metalkisses:  Beautifully put. If you wouldn’t say it to a member of the group in question, DON’T SAY IT AT ALL.

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@iarebridezilla:  My only caveat to what you say here is that sometimes the white person pointing out racism isn’t wrong.  Example: there’s a restaurant in my town that decorates with all kinds of kitsch.  You know the type – old signs, yard sale figurines, etc. When I went for the first time after they’d opened, I noticed that one of their pieces of decor was a “lawn jockey,” a racist caricature.

I mentioned (politely!) it to the hostess, and I later emailed the restaurant owner (via the link on their website), saying that I was sure she didn’t realize that it was problematic, but thought she would want to know that it had a racist past and would be quite disturbing to some patrons, myself included. I included several links explaning its history. I got back a defensive, angry email saying that “I happened to find out from the hostess htat you were white, as were the other two people who have complained about it. I asked the African-Americans who work in the kitchen and they said they weren’t bothered.”

Um. So A) THREE PEOPLE have complained about it and you still haven’t done anything, and B) You’re concluding that it’s not really racist based on the assertions of people who depend on you for a living?!  Sure, that’s a good strategy.

Ugh. It made me so mad. And I’ve never gone back.

Post # 255
Member
9916 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

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@iarebridezilla:  I don’t understand why a white person can explain one concept, but not another.

It doesn’t matter WHO tells a person something is offensive — if the term is considered offensive, it’s offensive.  

 

Post # 256
Member
5217 posts
Bee Keeper

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@mightywombat:  I understand what you’re saying and agree that given the proper context or situation, one should say something. However; I am ultimately only responsible for  what comes out of my mouth , my actions and my reactions. I can raise my children to speak and act a certain way, but at some point it is also ultimately their decision of what type of person they want to be. It would be exhausting to correct every single person who said something off base. I can choose, though, how I react or take it. 

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