Post # 1
Fiance and I have been long distance since we met. We’ve spent tons of time apart and you’d think I’d be used to it now. He’s 2 weeks away from being done with school and closing the long-distance gap (until September when he starts a job 2 hours away, which is much better than the 6 hours it is now). I’m just having a much harder time than normal dealing with the distance.
From about August-March we were able to see each other every 1 ½-2 ½ weeks. That was really awesome. But in the past two months he’s only been able to come down one weekend because of his service academy schedule. He’s busy so it’s not like I can just visit him. He hasn’t had any other weekends that he could have come down either, except this one. He told me about it a few weeks ago and I was so excited. And then he said he wanted to go on a camping trip with his friends instead. He asked me what I thought and I said I’d be upset but to go if he wants to. I couldn’t tell him no, I didn’t feel like it was my spot to “forbid him.” So now he’s without cell service somewhere with a few of his friends and I’m on weddingbee. 😛
In the beginning of our relationship I cried a lot when he was gone. He was out at sea for months at a time and I’d cry all the time. When he was back shoreside and we got to skype, talk on the phone, and have visits every couple of weeks, it wasn’t so hard. But lately I’ve been crying again.
It always seems like the last couple of days before he gets home are the hardest. So this is probably the same sort of thing on a bigger scale since I know that we’ll be done with long distance soon. This isn’t as hard on him as it seems to be on me, he’s even told me so. He’s been away from everything he loves for 8 years anyway because he went to a boarding school before college, so he’s used to it. That would explain why he didn’t think too much of just going on a camping trip this weekend.
I just need some positive words. 🙁 It hasn’t been a very fun couple of months. I won’t even get to talk to Fiance until Sunday when he gets back to cell service. Even with long distance I’m used to having at least some form of communication, so I’m going a little crazy.
Post # 2
I feel you in that it really sucks! My boyfriend is military and it’s not the days leading up to seeing him that suck – it’s the days just after. I only see him maybe 3 times a year and with no end to that in sight otherwise we are seriously discussing getting engaged in about a year. I mean, we’ve been discussing it for a year or more already, but now with it being closer it’s just more real somehow.
We Skype, message, text, call, and, when we can, visit. It’s infrequent at best and expensive and it sucks. He sees me on winter and summer block leave and I visit him once or twice a year as well, but the flights and accommodations and gas and everything really do add up. I just went up to the NE USA to be there at the ceremony for his return from deployment, so that means the flight for me, a place for us to stay since he’s in barracks, rental car because he sold his before going to the Middle East, gas, food, then a rental car for him because acquiring the car he purchased had a few hiccups, etc. And I was REALLY fortunately that he has a desk job that allowed him to send me messages while working his endless 12 on 12 off shifts all through deployments. He wasn’t out in any sort of real danger. We CONSTANTLY talk night and day and every time I see him it feels more frustrating to sleep alone and rely on technology just to hear his voice.
So yes, I feel you. Keep in mind though – you are already engaged. He wants to spend his life with you. Sounds like you guys have a plan for being together. If you need to count down on the calendar, so be it. Focus on some YOU time until then. If he’s coming to you then that means a lot of change for him, so let him have some of these valuable memories with his friends before he leaves them.
I don’t have a lot of magical, worldly experience, but that’s my input anyway.
Post # 3
- Wedding: August 2018 - Banquet Hall/Conference Center
You’re lucky that your LDR has a closing date and you are engaged soon – try to focus on that 🙂 Plus, something you can fill the time with is wedding planning
But yeah, I hear you. When I have my days where I am lonely and exclaim “I just wish I had someone to come home to!” my LDR boyfriend just reminds me the countdown of days till we see each other again (usually every 4-6 weeks) and tells me to not be so dependent on him and find things that make me happy regardless of my relationship, like a hobby or a class or other friends or a second job. While it’s annoying have to listen to that and for him to not share my feelings of isolation/need to be near people sometimes, deep down I know he’s right. This is when age differences, cultural differences, personality differences, or in your case, job/geographical differences can play a big role in defining each person’s unique circumstance.