(Closed) I hate the ring :( And the proposal was…lame?

posted 9 years ago in Rings
Post # 92
Member
4554 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

The proposal is over. You don’t get a mulligan on that. All you can do now is learn to love the story. I think despite what TV, Facebook and Pinterest would like to have us believe, most of us have to do a little bit of learning to love the proposal. Our men aren’t mind-readers, and there’s no way to say “I’d like it to be on the beach at sunset” or “I’d like it to be at a fancy restaurant with the moon glinting off the snow falling gently outside” without sounding like a total shrew, but if you’ve been waiting a while or are a little older, and that’s your dream, it’s hard not to feel a wee bit disappointed when your dream doesn’t come true, or you get proposed to in a way that isnt your personality. That part of the story is written, and you only get one with this man. Your only options are to get a new man, or learn to love the story, because the only thing complaining to him about it will do is sully it beyond the point of you or him ever being able to love it in the future.

As for the ring: Wanting something you love isn’t spoiled. Some on these boards will encourage you to martyr yourself to this thing, insinuating that because he loved you enough to propose, you should just gladly accept whatever he chooses to give you. I think that’s bull. You told him what you liked and what you didn’t, and he disregarded that. You ought to switch the ring out, but please do it with a quickness, before the return date runs out or you scratch the gold.

Post # 93
Member
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@valintine

@blingbling

@huser2012

@padme

@bluespinach

WOAH ladies… I did not by any means want to offent the OP, if I did I want to presonally apologize. I would be more than happy to delete my post if it is upsetting to her. In my post, if you look back, i told her that i loved her ring and attempted to comfort/explain that he was probably nervous and wanted to surprise her.  My proposal was NOT elaborate by the way. It was smiply photographed. I didn’t start a thread about it because my intention was NOT to brag about anything, otherwise i would have certainly done so. I attempted to simply share and it was in no way intended to hurt anyones feelings. Like I said… if i offended the OP I apologize. Lets be adults here. There is no reason to dedicate a paper of a responce to show me I am insensitive when in all honesty that was not my intent. I feel very badly that the OP is dissapointed about the ring and the proposal. I also can see how the photo could have been taken in a different way, for that ONCE again, I apologize. 

Post # 94
Member
1513 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@LeosLady28:  I doubt you offended the OP, but you might have broken her heart a little bit because you went on (in detail) about how you got exactly what she did not. Maybe you were just carried away on your own cloud 9?

I was serious when I suggested you post about your own story (in a more appropriate forum, of course). It looks like a wonderful one, and I’d love to see this ring that your Fiance put so much thought into.

It would be appropriate to delete your other post, though, if that’s even possible.

ETA there ain’t nothin wrong with bragging! That’s what the ring/proposals/ect forums are for!

Post # 95
Member
56 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@valintine I deleted the photo, however the rules and regulations of the blog won’t let me delete the post itself (i would otherwise). They only delete posts that show personal information (like address or phone number). Like I said, i really didn’t mean to hurt her feelings, truly. I can def. see how that can be taken as being carried away or even bragging. I have no idea why what i meant to say came out the way it did. I think this blog does bring out the extremes of feelings at times. Before anyone else “pushes” me off the bridge … I shall be more mindful in my future posts and pay attention which forum I am replying to ๐Ÿ™‚ I hope the OP can forgive my blunder… 

Post # 96
Member
19 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I think you should have a ring you really love (if the jewelry store will allow a trade). It’s the one piece of jewelry you will be wearing everyday. It sounds like he is more excited and proud about the good deal he got, so if he gets another good deal, it might be ok! ๐Ÿ™‚  If they won’t do a trade, maybe you could have it reset.

Post # 98
Member
851 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Thanks for the update.  I’m glad you feel a lot better.  I still want to know what happened to the two rings you guys decided on together?  Did he purposefully decide to go in another direction?  Did you talk about him about why he chose something totally different that what you picked out?

Post # 99
Member
361 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Nice update!

 

I just want to say that I was a little disappointed in my lackluster proposal (we had talked about getting married for quite sometime, and on the street outside of Madison Square Garden — we hadn’t gone there, we just happened to be passing by at the time) my now-husband said “ok. let’s do it. Let’s get married.” Then he told some passers by on the street that he loved me, that I said yes, and that we’re getting married.  In addition, I didn’t (and still don’t) have an engagment ring.  My guy put together a really awesome “proposal video” after we were already married, as a kind of gift, which is fantastic.

 

Anyway, all that to say that I’m so in love with my husband and Fr*aking ecstatic to be married to him.

 

Glad to hear that you’re feeling good. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 100
Member
361 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Ooops. Double post.

Post # 101
Member
161 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

@vintagebride143:  Agree.

 

Edit: didn’t see the update! Glad to hear you and Fiance love it now . ๐Ÿ™‚

 

Post # 102
Member
3879 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

So show us this ring already! ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 103
Member
1410 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

@shrubfish09:  I’m so glad your ring is growing on you! It’s gorgeous, elegant, and timeless! Wait till you get a band with that beauty!

As for the proposal, maybe it wasn’t the most magical, but it is yours. And that in itself makes it spectacular! Now go enjoy planning!

Post # 104
Member
48 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 2008

I picked out my own ring – no proposal – just told him I wanted to get married – he asked if I wanted a ring… I said yes and we went shopping – the ring he originally wanted for me was a saphire…I said yes I love it for my right hand…so…we shopped around and I got a lovely ring – he asked me several times if I was sure that was the ring I wanted…yes – I totally happy

Post # 106
Member
180 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

Your ring is so beautiful and timeless! I love it! 

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