- 7 years ago
Ok, i wont even get into the back story, its all in my recently started threads. here is the thing. i have a conscience and i feel bad about the whole thing. i know you all will say my friend is nuts and i do agree.
In her last email, she told me it was all miscommunication and she never meant to be condescending. then last weekend came and i was in town (this was the weekend where she had wanted me to wait to get my cat back, you know the extra 2 weeks she wanted to keep him). Well, i was in town for another party and she was supposed to come. well of course she didn’t. BUT she passed along a gift through another mutual friend that was attending the party….i immediately felt bad when i saw she sent a gift….until i opened it and was a gift FOR MY CAT! she included a polite little card stating that she meant to give this to me the last time she saw me but forgot – its one of her blankets that apparently my cat liked sleeping on during her stay there.
So, somehow her manipulative move had an effect on me and i have just had this whole nagging feeling in the back of my head all week and I am wondering again if i over reacted……should we really end a long term friendship over this…..maybe if i had written her back anything at all, she might have come to the party and it might have been the start of repairing the friendship, but since i didn’t write back, she didn’t come….blah blah blah, this is what is going through my head.
SO, i am tempted again to respond to her last message even though i swore i wouldn’t. this time though, i would keep it short and to the point, as most of the bees encouraged me to do the last time. what do you think?
here is the key part of her last email to me (she wrote a lot more, but that was the main point):
What a shame that you assumed that sitting down with us would have been a condescending cat-care lecture instead of us, your friends, sharing the details, along with our joys, of taking care of YourCat
This what i would like to reply……the question is, should i or shouldn’t I????
It seems that you think everything was due to lack of communication. Perhaps you are correct because I feel you have misunderstood me again. I do not wish to go back and forth on these matters, however, I do want to clarify that MyHusband and I would have been completely happy to sit down with you and YourHusband, our friends, and hear your ‘sharing of the details, along with your joys, of taking care of MyCat’. This in itself was not at all offensive to us. We felt you were condescending simply because you made this discussion conditional upon taking MyCat home – this is what I maintain was not your decision to make.