(Closed) I have a confession to make…

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 32
Member
289 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I don’t think it’s bad to still want to travel – not at all! Most married couples travel together though or wives go on a “girls trip” with their friends. Going alone is pretty damn weird though…

Post # 33
Member
4430 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

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@mixtapehearts:  Thank you! I wasn’t being rude I was just trying to rationalize with the situation to better understand because it’s kind of hard to process what the issue is here..

 

it’s really between you and your fiance…if I came off rude, then sorry?

Post # 34
Member
339 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I too have the travel bug.  In fact, the travel bug is what lead me to my FH.  I traveled to Greece, met him (as an adult—I knew him as a kid and then he moved there) and now we’re getting married.  We plan on traveling together as much as possible.  I think if you plant the seed in his head about certain places, and try them out, he might catch the travel bug from you too.  There is nothing wrong with it, and it doesn’t have to be an “early 20-something” ideal.  I think it is fascinating to learn about new places—stay in non-lux places so you can really get to know the locals, and learn about the place you are visiting…guess that’s why I’m an anthropologist.  Anyways, you do have to realize that there has to be a balance though, because you are joining into a PARTNERSHIP and that your choices will now directly impact him, just as his will impact you.  As long as you are honest and upfront of your expectations, I don’t see why there would be a problem.  Marriage is an adventure, not a death sentence!!!!!

Post # 35
Member
2699 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

“I dont remember ever saying I wanted to be gone for long periods of time.”


Perhaps when you wrote “I dont want to just go off on my own for months at a time!”…
we presumed that you meant you didn’t want to be going off for months at a time on your own.

I think

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@BellaDee:  gave you good advice.

Post # 36
Member
4430 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

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@ticatica:  I knew I said that for a reason! I just couldn’t find where I got that from…

so yes, OP, that is why I said what I did.

Post # 37
Member
9541 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

I can actually understand your concerns about settling down, as I too have the travel bug. And having traveled under different circumstances, I can understand your concerns about how you and your fiance are different. But I think there are several issues here and most are compromisable.

The first and hardest is if you really want to live for an extended time in another country. That is, obviously, something that would have to be cleared with your fiance and is complicated when you have another person, with their own career to think about.

If you’re talking more about short vacations, then I think you and your fiance will just have to compromise and hopefully you will both learn to like each other’s kind of travel. Maybe you plan one vacation where you stay in hostels and travel through remote asian countries, then he gets to plan a vacation where you stay in 4 star hotels on a tour of Europe. He gets to learn how great local culture can be and you get to learn how great luxury service can be. Win win. And if you want to continue traveling by yourself or with friends or family, that’s totally okay as well.

So just talk to your guy. I don’t think it will be as much of an issue as it’s becoming in your head. We all have to grow up, but we don’t have to get boring.

The topic ‘I have a confession to make…’ is closed to new replies.

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