(Closed) I have a question for all bees already engaged or married….

posted 10 years ago in Proposals
Post # 32
158 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

We,ve looked at rings to gether and talked about marriage….it was a given that it would happen. I even knew the year in which it would take place (because thats waht my Fiance promised me) and the year had dwindled down….all the way down. My Fiance proposed on Christmas morning and i was totally surprised evenn though in my gut i knew it was coming. your guy will find the right way to blow you away!!! DOnt worry about those other people

Post # 33
12 posts
  • Wedding: October 2010

You will be surprised as long as your Fiance can keep a secret.  We had looked at rings online, and I pointed out ones I liked, and he showed me ones he liked, but we didn’t pick one out specifically.  He didn’t tell me when he bought it or anything, but I knew it was happening soon.  I was very surprised when in the middle of a family reunion he got on his knee and pulled out the solitaire marquise we had looked at! He had even mentioned possibly proposing to me during this event and I still was surprised (partly because I didn’t really expect him to do it then, but he is a tricky one!).  You will be surprised as long as he doesn’t straight out tell you “Hey, I am proposing on this day with this ring,” Shoot, even if he told you the day, you wouldn’t know how or when or under what circumstances.  Trust me, you will be surprised, and even better, you will be ecstatic!

Post # 34
120 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

i picked out my ring.  we shopped together quite a bit, but when it came time to actually buy it i actually pulled up the webpage, handed him the laptop and left the room.

then he told me the minute he received it via text message.

and i ran home from work and he told me to wait in the other room because he wanted to set something up and i knew he was going to do it RIGHT THEN and i still felt surprised (i hadn’t seen the ring in person and it was more beautiful than i could have imagined) and cried like a baby.  didn’t ruin a thing.

Post # 35
1392 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010 - Heron Hill Winery

I don’t think it’s ruined at all…you still have no idea when it’s coming…I wrote a post on this not too long ago:

A Tale of Two Rings”¦

I thought the proprosal was looming so I nagged and nagged, but eventually got a very unexpected proposal with a different ring then we had initially picked together….my advice is to practice patience and forget about the ring shopping trip…if you are constantly thinking about it could ruin the surprise.

Post # 36
77 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

You still have NO idea what he is going to say! That’s half the fun.

Post # 37
2788 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I don’t think it will ruin the surprise at all. Even if you know, you’ll be engaged!!! And that is really the best part.  Besides, FIs tend to be super sneaky about these things and I bet you’ll be really surprised anyway!

Post # 38
256 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I was still surprised and I knew that we were going to get married! I looked with a couple of girlfriends a few times and had told him what i liked and disliked. I wanted a solitary round diamond. Small and practical, yet pretty and beautiful. oh and that I was a size 7. ;D

He went out with his father to look at rings and he asked my dad for my hand both without me knowing anything about it and he still surprised me with the proposal, so I don’t think knowing that eventually you are going to get a ring really ruins the surprise of the proposal.

Post # 39
6 posts
  • Wedding: August 2011

We picked out our engagement ring together. I wouldn’t have it any other way. It was special to us and I was still suprised when he proposed.   🙂

Post # 40
1869 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

I showed my Fiance what I liked and didn’t like, so I wouldn’t have to worry about getting something I totally hated.  I waited months for him to propose, and he finally did!  I was really surprised when it happened, so I don’t think it will be ruined for you.  Even though you’ve looked at rings together, you don’t know when or how it’s going to happen!

Post # 41
493 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I knew the ring was coming ahead of time (I helped pick out what style I wanted) but it was several months after (6 months or so) that we actually got engaged.  For the first few months, every time we went out to dinner or did something special I was always expecting the ring.  This went on for several months with no ring, and I tried my best not to think about it (but it was on my mind CONSTANTLY).  The day he actually chose to propose I had NO idea it was coming and didn’t think he would be romantic enough to think about proposing to me at that time so it was a COMPLETE surprise.  It was the one day I didn’t expect it… which was really cool.  I’m glad it worked out that way because I thought that knowing the ring was coming would ruin the surprise aspect.. but he still found a way to surprise me. 🙂

Post # 42
597 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

yes, it was quite a surprise!!!

Long Story: I picked out the rings with fiance, he pickedout/ordered the diamond on his own(though I told him what I cut I wanted) and never saw it. But then he got wet feet, etc……and we actually broke-up!! (He had meddlesome parents, he was going through a confusion, immature phase, etc. etc.) So when we  brokeup, he left the rings and the diamond(they were not set)….and I actually saw the diamond, loose…..it was beautiful.

We got back together…..were and on and off for awhile….not thinking of marriage….him still going through a confusion phase.

Then about 7 months after we had originally brokeup, he decided he wanted to marry me after all……snapped out of his confusion phase. I almost didn’t believe it. He went and set the diamond in the ring. I actually came with him to drop it off, but when he picked it up (alone)..I didn’t come for the surprise factor!!

He didn’t tell me when he would propse……he said soon, but I didn’t really believe him (after all, he was so confused earlier). He surprised me like 3 or 4 weeks later or so…..on Valentine’s Day! I was completely surprised…..

We’re actually thinking of redesigning/fix my wedding band though…because it doesn’t sit like it should, in my opinion…

Post # 43
4411 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2010 - Savannah, GA

I don’t think it’s completely ruined it.

Haven’t you known for a long time that he’s going to ask you to marry him?  How has going and picking out rings you like and don’t like changed that? You still know he’s going to ask and you still don’t know exactly when, right?

Can you imagine how horrible it would be if you were in a relationship with someone and have totally no clue whatsoever what his intentions were? I think it would be absolutely horrible.

I mean think about it… The only way a proposal could ever be a complete and total surprise would be if you did not know what your SO felt about you and marriage. I think most people know whether they’re going to get married or not before the proposal…and if they don’t, you’ve got to wonder how much they really know about each other.

Surprise or no surprise, you’re going to be completely thrilled when he proposes.  He loves you and you love him–that’s what’s most important. The only real difference now is you know he’s not going to pick out a ring you totally hate.


Post # 44
18628 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

We had gone through pictures to decide what type of ring I liked and I knew he had the ring.  I was still suprised when we got engaged because he kept tricking me into thinking that it wasn’t going to happen soon.

Post # 45
28 posts
  • Wedding: November 2011

That’s a shame that people would say you couldn’t even know what the ring looks like. it doesn’t ruin the engagement surprise.  Don’t stress out about it , you’ll just worry yourself needlessly. You know it’s coming your way  🙂

2 yrs ago my fiancee and I took one of my friends ring shopping and it was then that i tried on my ring, first ring I tried on and I loved it. he loves it too, calls it the green lantern ring.  Then 4 months ago we happened by Tiffanys and we went in so I could try on a different one I saw online.  Also tried on a few more rings but I still loved the first one most.  2 weeks before I got engaged, one of my closest friends got engaged and it was then that fiancee said, you know im still saving, right?  So I was sad faced for a day but 2 weeks after that we went to a beautiful museum and he surprised me with it.  I could not have been more shocked b/c i really didnt think that would happen for another half year or more.


Post # 46
907 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

I definately do not think your surprise will be ruined!  My fiance and I looked at rings many months before he proposed.  He did get the ring that we both fell in love with, but I didn’t know for sure that he’d get that ring and I had no idea when he’d actually get it and give it to me.  When he proposed (2 nights ago!) with the ring, I was in such a state of shock that I thought I was in a dream.  It was so memorable and special and absolutely nothing was ruined by going ring-shopiing together.  If anything, it made the whole process more exciting.

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