Post # 1
Hello bees, I havent been on here in a while but I need some advice…
A little background:
I was registered to attend graduate school this fall but have put it off due to the fact that the school i accepted a spot at neglected to tell me they were having accreditation issues and may or may not lose their accreditation next year. I dont feel confident going to a school having issues especially since my husband is paying for my degree. Anyway, our ORIGINAL plan was to wait for me to have a baby at the end of my graduate degree which would have been by 2014. This wasnt because of money but more or less because we figured we can wait that long. However, after almost a year of being married we both really want a baby and feel ready for one. We can afford it even on his salary (I am a part time working bee, looking for full time.) I also figured that
A. Graduate school will cost me much less in a year because I will be a resident of the state i moved to after i got married (if you are not a resident, grad school costs almost double as much as in state tuition)
B. His mother is retiring in a year which means free baby sitting (she volunteered, 🙂 ) So i will have someone to watch the little one while I take classes a few days a week.
So thats our little background. We are going to start TTC by the end of August/begining of September. If we’re blessed enough to get pregnant in September…. I am terrified and excited.
I have a million questions but dont even know where to start!!! I havent told many people we want to start trying because I noticed some people were trying to convince me to put it off longer. I am 23, hubby is 26. I know by a lot of peoples standards I am young but I have been blessed enough to have traveled extensively, enjoyed my fair share of nights out on the town, and really truly want a baby. I even had my sister in law try to convince me NOT to get pregnant because she is getting married next April and we will have a lot to do. (Because the world revolves around her! )
I get a lot of horror stories, but I want to hear good stories!
What is it like in the first month, second month, third?? What are the best parts of being pregnant? Whats the best part of being a new mommy? I know I want this, but I want to feel encouraged in my decision and I have not been getting that from those around me other than hubby and his parents.
Post # 3
I used to be in your shoes, I was HORRIFIED of pregnancy/child birth.
So what I did was educate myself and try to surround myself with positive things about Pregnancy.
#1 I read 2 really great non scary books about Pregnancy.
#2 Sometimes I go on youtube and search “Pregnancy Reactions” and its women telling their moms, sisters, husbands that their pregnant and 99% of the reactions are great, it always puts a smile on my face.
#3 I look at pictures of newborns and babies and tell myself that at the end of all this pain you get a beautiful present like this!
As far as the age thing, we are all different. I know at 23 I was not ready for kids, I wanted to wait till I was out of my 20’s and married for at least 3 years.
But like I said we all mature differently so I wish you the best.
Post # 4
You’re on the same timeline as us! Getting married in 10 days, and starting TTC afterwards (Hoping for Late Aug conception). 🙂 I’m terrified as well!
I never, ever in my whole life wanted children, but finding the Love of My Life and realizing I want a family to call my own, and with him, has changed everything – so to go from 100% Anti-Baby to Baby-Crazy has been an emotional ordeal.
I’m going to watch this tread, for advice from all the other (more experienced) bees. We’re all sorta in this together, right?
Post # 5
I’m going to follow this thread as well, I’d love to hear what the momma bees have to say 🙂
I’m also a young wife ttc. I’m 22 but my husband is 32 and we’re both finished with school and settled into our careers. I haven’t told anyone that we’re ttc but when people ask if we’re having kids anytime soon, I say “eh, I don’t know, probably in the next few years.” And they always say “That’s good, you don’t need kids right now!” Or something to that effect. My grandmother even said that my cousin was better prepared for children than me. My cousin never went to college, works as a cashier at K-Mart and got pregnant by her boyfriend less than 6 months after she left her husband… Not sure how she’s better prepared but certainly didn’t follow that up with “so Darling Husband and I pulled the goalie!”
Post # 6
We’re trying for baby #2 right after the wedding so we’re on the same timeline.
Pregnancy for me at least is amazing. I was very lucky that I didn’t get morning sickness and I didn’t gain any weight. I have seriously never looked or felt better! Feeling that little life growing inside you is so strange and awesome, it’s an experience that I really can’t describe. You’ll experience it soon I hope.
Motherhood is both the hardest and best job in the world. Dirty Delete is 2 and a half and she is the light of my life. It’s so amazing to be there when she discovers the world!
Post # 7
It’s good to hear from you bees who are also trying! I am so nervous but my husband is great at calmIng my nerves. The excitement that creeps into his voice when we talk about having a baby is wonderful.
I am not a fan of people telling me I should or should not have a baby. I either get I’m waiting too long or I should wait longer. The I took too long is hilarious to me because I haven’t even had my first anniversary yet! I usually shut it down pretty quick but it still bugs me. I prefer to support those around me wether they choose to wait 13 years like my cousin k did or start right away like others I know.
Post # 8
@apex: I will be 22 soon too!!! And my husband is 32!! I am glad to see there’s someone else that’s in the early 20s. IRL people are so judgemental of us TTC… People are slowly becoming more accepting of it with time.
@AlbanianBride27: The first month is rough for some. For us, we got pregnant on our destination wedding vaca, so I was totally not expecting for it to work our first real month trying, but it happened, so it wasn’t too bad for us (we ended up losing it). But our second month was rough!!!! EVERYTHING made me think I was pregnant. Thirs month, a little better. Here we are fourth month since then and it has gotten much easier. Congrats on TTC!!!!!!!! You will love it, its fun and exciting but very stressful at the same time! Everything will fall into place exactly the way it’s supposed to. Good luck and baby dust.
Post # 9
How quickly do you begin showing? and by showing i mean its obvious your prego
Post # 10
Every woman is different. Usually by 16 weeks you show, but some are tiny even up to 20-25 weeks. It depends on your frame, the woman, andurge strength of your abdominal muscles. I have a friend who is a personal trainer who is ripped and at 36 weeks she was still smaller than I am. She never once got asked if she was pregnant.
Post # 11
@AlbanianBride27: Congratulations on your decision to start trying! I’m 31 weeks pregnant now, so I can tell you a bit about pregnancy!
First…I don’t want to scare you, but don’t be discouraged if it doesn’t happen right away. I was older than you when I got pregnant, but we’ve been through a ton. I had 2 miscarriages and finally got pregnant with our little guy now after 18 months. So it can take a while for some, while others…it works the first time!
With that said, I started showing probably around 12-14 weeks. I have a smaller frame, so you could tell I was putting on weight in my stomach area. Some people said that they knew while others had no idea until I told them.
I’m not going to lie, the first trimester is hard! I was sick morning, noon and night. The second trimester, my arms would fall asleep on me at night, so I wasn’t getting much sleep. So the tiredness never really let up for me. Now that I’m in the third trimester, I’m starting to get a bit uncomfortable with how big I’m getting.
But…the best part about pregnancy is definitely feeling the baby kick. It’s amazing to know that you’re creating this little person. I saw a saying the other day that made me melt. It went something like, “You may never know how much I love you, but then again, you are the only one who knows what my heart sounds like on the inside…”
Just wanted to say good luck, and while my pregnancy isn’t the easiest, I definitely feel blessed that I’m only 9 weeks away from meeting the little guy we worked so hard to create!