- 6 years ago
- Wedding: February 2013
Hey bees, I really could use some advice right now.
Okay sorry, this is going to be a little long.
Fiance and I moved into the “city” about 6 months ago to be closer to his job. We were really excited about the move since neither one of us had ever actually lived IN the city, only the suburbs. We were looking forward to being so close to all of the action, closer to our friends, and for me, closer to my mom.
We knew we were going to have to adjust and we were ready for it. We didn’t realize when we signed our lease that there was a fire station a block away, so we constantly hear sirens going off at all hours of the day and night, we hear constant traffic… it’s just busy. Compared to where we lived before, this was like night and day. But, we adjusted and knew this is what was to be expected.
However… about a month ago Fiance and I woke up on a Saturday at about 5:45 a.m. we walked out to find one heck of an unpleasant surprise.
We had woken up at 4:45 a.m., gotten ready, had our bags packed, hotel booked, and were ready to make our 1 night trip up to Austin to visit a WEDDING VENUE. We were so excited, even though we were leaving at 5:45 on a Saturday, to make this trip and we walk out to this sh**. UGH. $5k later (thankfully insurance took care of it, minus that stupid deductible), we finally got it fixed and fine.
Fiance has been super anxious and paranoid ever since, with every right. I feel terrible that he had to go through this. Afterall, he just got this truck 6 months ago, something he worked so hard to get for himself. This is his DREAM truck, all decked out and everything, and now it has been tarnished because some jerks feel that they have the right to take other people’s hard earned things. Sorry I’m still extremely pissed, but I know they will get hit by the karma bus and I know it’ll hit them hard.
He has told me several times how he hates feeling unsafe in his own home and how he holds his breath every morning walking down the stairs because he doesn’t know if something else has happened. I HATE that he feels this way I really do.
So after all of that, here is what I need some advice on:
Despite this horrible incident, I love our little apartment. Prior to living here we lived in a small suburb about 45 minutes out of the city. Well, technically 65 minutes out since it took an extra freaking 20 minutes to get on the freeway! Before moving in with Fiance it took me 5 minutes to hop on the tollway! It’s gorgeous out there don’t get me wrong, it’s just not where a couple in their 20’s want to be. It’s a wonderful place to raise a family, just not so much for us. We were about 5 miles from FI’s parents, whom I love dearly; I was just pretty far from my family. While living there I got pretty depressed and Fiance (then boyfriend) and I had a pretty turbulent relationship. I felt so secluded out there, I was so far from my family, friends, and everything I had known.
When we moved to the city we were both excited because we looked at it as a fresh start. Ever since we’ve lived here our relationship has been amazing, I’m happy, FI’s happy. He even works 3 miles from home right now! We actually have a life now. Fiance joined a basketball league, I get to see my friends and family, we’re actually active and not cooped up in our apartment every day.
This is where he proposed to me, where we’ve built our life, made new friends, and have just been plain out happier.
The apartment complex recently told Fiance that if we wanted to get out of our lease they would let us without penalties because of what happened to us. I told Fiance we could look around at different apartments before we put our notice in writing. FI’s best friend from college recently moved into an apartment in another suburb (about 20 minutes in the opposite direction) and he really liked the area and apartment complex.
So today we decided to look around, stopped by, took a tour, and signed a lease.
I got home and started crying my eyes out! I don’t know why I’m being such a baby! I love my apartment, our home, and it just makes me so sad that we have to leave it because of stupid crap like this.
I like this new apartment, it is a little smaller than the current one we have, but I like it. I know it’s so silly to feel so attached to an APARTMENT. Our current lease would have been up in August any way… I just didn’t expect this to happen so fast!! It doesn’t help that my mom is out of the country and I can’t talk to her about this.
I know leaving makes sense, I think that our prior experience and what our relationship went through when living in the other suburb just has me shooken up. I don’t want to go through that again! Ugh. I don’t know.
Another MAJOR factor is my school. Right now I’m taking mainly online classes so it wouldn’t be a big deal. But in order for me to graduate in December (and I WILL graduate, I refuse to be in school any longer than that), I have to take as much summer school as possible, and those are all ON campus. That means that 5 days a week for 3 months I will have to be commuting about an hour and 20 minutes just to get to school. That is seriously hard to swallow.
After coming home and Fiance seeing me so upset, he kept telling me that this was my choice and that if we wanted to stay where we were we could. He told me to sleep on it and I needed to give him a definite answer tomorrow so that we could cancel the lease we signed before it finishes processing.
He kept telling me he just wanted me to be happy. All I want is for HIM to be happy and I know that’s not going to be here.
I guess after writing this all out I can see there really isn’t a choice, we need to leave and just brave it out.