(Closed) I just attended one of the most disorganized, cheap weddings EVER.

posted 9 years ago in Recaps
Post # 32
Member
704 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

“I love how hoity-toity and self righteous when it comes to posts like these.” 

Saying that it’s okay to have gray folding chairs, artificial flowers and a buffet on styrofoam is not hoity toity.  It is, however, hoity toity to harshly judge a wedding based on those things.  It’s also not self-righteous.  This is supposed to be a community where you are encouraged to create the wedding you want and can afford.  I hope no one on here is planning a reception that is similar to this one because posts like this would make them feel grossly inadequate because they may not want or be able to afford sprawling center pieces and chair covers.

It’s true that the disorganization and drunkeness was rude, but that’s the only thing that anyone should complain about because at the end of the day they got a free meal.  And to be honest, they could have called a cab if they wanted to leave so badly.

Post # 33
Member
324 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

you all are so politically correct. Puhleez..that wedding sounded, chaotic, cheesy, tacky, and also horrible for the guests. Maybe the bride and groom had fun, but all of those elements combine = a tacky wedding. AND yes, that is in the eye of the beholder but most people will be seeing it from that perspective. just saying. lighten up folks. geez!

Post # 34
Member
371 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I don’t want to spend my wedding day entertaining lots of people either, but that’s why I’m planning a smaller wedding. It sounds like they probably should have done the same.

Post # 35
Member
1148 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

i think it was the disrespect the OP felt from the beginning (no organization of timing/hotel, ceremony) that set the tone of this event. 

I very much believe that a wedding and the reception is not about the couple (shocking, i know!) but a way of celebrating with the people you are inviting. It’s annoying how everyone keeps going on about how it’s YOUR day and you can do what you like. You should treat your guests like gold (within your means) and make them feel welcomed and loved and that their presence at your wedding is a true blessing. 

Little things like not enough drink, cheap flowers and whatnot would go unnoticed if the guests felt honoured. 

Post # 36
Member
18628 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Wow this is so horrible!  I have to admit that when I first saw the thread, I thought it was going to be complaints about the person’s taste but this was just terrible!

Post # 37
Member
2739 posts
Sugar bee

@Twista: Okay, apologies to all. If you are into grey metal chairs and subpar decorations if at all and in the interest of saving money, no dj at all BUT are okay with making your guests wait hours upon hours for you while comping on peanuts, then apologies for making ‘politically uncool remarks’ about your wedding. Sometimes the ‘treacle sweet’ tones used on WB gets to me. We are not kids, what do you care if someone on an internet board that you don’t know, makes snobby comments about an element or two of your wedding? And also, who said anything about chair sashes or centerpieces? I maintain, you do not need money to make good decor. I see lots of DIY projects that would rock more than the measly money I am willing to spend on my wedding. Anyhow, I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings but I still maintain that I agreee wholeheartedly with the original poster, I might not have used some of her words but I totally feel her sentiment. As I said, apologies in advance. But please, it is not by force to invite all and sundry to your wedding, get less people and a more cohesive timeline…

Post # 38
Member
2865 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I agree that people can have awesome low budget weddings so long as they are considerate of their guests. I’m sure the OP would have had an awesome time if they’d had music and the bride and groom had actually been around for most of the time.

I don’t think the amount of money you spends = the amount of enjoyment your guests have but since the wedding was so disorganized and guests were just sitting around not knowing what was going on they’re going to notice the fake/cheap decorations, etc.

Post # 39
Member
324 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

@bRooklynRocks: I AGREE !! If you are offended we think something you’re doing is tacky…and you care enough for it to bother you..well then probably your guests will too..so if an opinion matters so much then change whatever you are doing that is tacky…OR ignore us. 

Post # 40
Member
7429 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

I would have been beyond pissed had I attended that wedding!!

Post # 41
Member
545 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

Wow, it sounds terrible. Why did you stay so long without the bride and groom being there??

Post # 42
Member
1011 posts
Bumble bee

I think there’s a difference between a wedding that’s done on a budget and a “cheap” wedding.  A budget wedding is one that prioritizes purchases to make the day memorable (in a good way) for all.  A cheap wedding is one that is thrown together so there will be guests (who bring presents).

I agree there’s nothing wrong with very basic, simple decorations and simple food. What made the simple decorations and the simple meal stand out, was probably the fact that the OP had nothing to “distract” her from focusing on those things during the wedding and the reception.  It doesn’t sound like she got to see much of the bride & groom, yet the couple  (and wedding party) seemed to have had a pleasant, festive occasion.  It’s like the cumulative effect of everything that is leaving such a lasting impression.

Fabulous weddings are the ones where the guests really don’t remember anything about them, other than that they had a good time.  The bad ones are when people remember specific things . . . .

Post # 43
Member
333 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I would have called a cab and left if I were at that wedding.  The bride and groom obviously didn’t care about their guests at all.

Post # 44
Member
186 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

What I can’t understand is why fork over the money for a dj and only use him for part of the reception?

We couldn’t afford a DJ for our wedding so we made an IPod playlist.  Aside from one mishap (a different song started to play for the father/daughter dance, but our wonderfull Best Man fixed that real quick) it worked really well for us.

Post # 45
Member
122 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

That sounds awful.

I don’t think it’s the decor that ruins a wedding, but if the guests are ignored and bored out of their mind, then they start noticing how crappy *everything* at the wedding is.

Why even bother having a reception at that point? Why not just have a larger ceremony and then a small gathering with just the wedding party afterwards (since that is who the bride and groom ended up being with the whole night while the rest of the guests sat bored at the venue.)

My mother had a similar experience at a wedding she recently attended. The wedding party was there but it was almost like it was TOO organized lol! They had like an hour of speeches, then they played musical chairs for a few hours to determine who got the bouquet and who got the bride’s garter (30 some-odd people in each group so it took forever) then they FINALLY ate dinner, then there was the couple’s first dance, then the dance with the bride and groom and their parents, then the parents just danced together, then the people who got the bouquet and garter danced, then all the bridesmaids and groomsmen danced, ectect. There was literally hours where most of the 200 guests were just sitting there bored to pieces!

Post # 46
Member
9028 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

@Georgia Bee: I totally agree with you. not everyone can afford to have fancy tables and expensive food… what really matters for each wedding is that the bride and groom are happy with it. people have different standards. we cant all be the same

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