(Closed) I just don't know what to do anymore… (warning vent)

posted 5 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 3
Member
5965 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

Honey, it’s ok….really it is.  We’ve all been there, and with banking the way it is, it’s really easy to get mixed up or miss something and before you know it, overdraft city…find an app for your phone or tablet to help you keep track and don’t sweat it, it doesn’t make you a bad person.  

As far as being apart, I’ve been limping my step-daughter through this same thing with her SO who isn’t due back until Sunday….she’s miserable, lonely and misses him terribly…so yeah, we’re on the phone a lot right now and when i cant be on the phone with her, we’re IMing about nothing and everything from Christmas presents, to good nail polish, to who’s butt looks big on their Christmas card…you name it….find your buddy and stick with them, friends are the best medicine for lonliness.

I’m also totally with you on asking for money, it’s really hard to do that, especially if you are an independant person, but it’s ok, I mean , you two are in this together right?  It took me three years of marriage to finally ask Mr. 99 for money, it was so hard…he kind of blinked at me, got up, went to the safe, pulled out some cash and as he was thumbing through it mused, “I wondered how long it would take….three years is impressive….$200 cover your ass this month?”  I nodded and handed it to me, kissed my nose and said, “Keep the change gorgeous, you’re too cute to be broke.”

And that was that…so don’t worry, it’s all part of the deal!

Post # 5
Member
4275 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

You will be fine.

By the way, I am skipping on buying the christmas gifts this year, I just can’t afford it with bills and a baby on the way. It sucks, but that is just how it is.

Post # 6
Member
6021 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2017

As someone who is the bill person in the house I can tell you that you are not the first to have pain in the ass situations happen like this. I like to think im pretty darn good with the bills and keeping our money in good shape but I have made some insane mistakes before and truly have also been screwed over by things not hitting when I thought they would. I once gave my son’s school a check for his tuition ($350) and they take anywhere from 3 days to a month to cash the check. Im used to it so I just wait to make sure the balance matches. I don’t actually go in to details though all the time, as long as the balance is where it should be, most of the time I assume im good to go. I do so well with budgeting and know what to spend and what not to spend that 99% of the time, my loose methods like this work. Except for when they dont lol. Like when AT&T charged my account twice for a 240 dollar bill, which put me way lower than I thought, well of course thats when the check for the tuition hit and put me in overdraft, which I also had to pay a fee for. Luckily my bank coves checks as long as it doesn’t make me go over -$500. So the school still got their money, but for the time from then until our account got replenished I had to go into savings and credit cards to get us through. It was a mess after that though trying to play catch up and get back to where we could put money in savings again comfortably. Money sucks.

Post # 7
Member
2840 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Sorry that happened. A similar situation happened to my sister earlier this year right before her wedding. She never realized that her landlady hadn’t cash her rent check so she spent more money than she really had. Her Fiance gave her a couple hundred to help her get back on track.  Take a deep breath and it’ll all be better soon.

I hate being away from Darling Husband. I feel ya. Keep yourself occupied and rely on friends. That will really help.

Best wishes to you!

Post # 9
Member
286 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@hiroshymatetrastar:  Im sorry you are dealing with all of this! I dont know who you bank with but I know several banks have a free texting thing that will text you your balance every day at the same time. Also, you can set it up to text you if your balance gets below a certain threshold. I hope that helps! But like Nona said, we have all been there!! It somehow will be ok!

Post # 11
Member
286 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Ugh that stinks. :/  Are any of the items disputable? It seem strange to me that there would be holds that are a month old. I have always been told that buinesses only have 3 business days to take the money out of the account. Again, idk where you bank but the longest hold I’ve ever seen on an account is always gas stations and they are usually a few days. (I work at a bank)

Post # 12
Member
9483 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2012

@hiroshymatetrastar:  So sorry you’re going through that.  I’ll never forget the time where I thought I transferred money into my one account to pay our rent.  Unfortunately, I realized it too late and the check bounced.  I was so completely embarassed.  I never had that happen to me before.  I tried to explain to the management that the money was in a different account and I had proof.  They wanted no part in believing me (hello, I’m offering you a statement to prove it.. hah sorry, I digress!).  Now I’m like triple checking everything.  I use online banking to track all my processing payments, what bills were taken out and what wasn’t.  I’m not sure if I even know how to balance a check book!

Post # 14
Member
3041 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

@hiroshymatetrastar:  Call your car insurance ASAP & ask if you can make the payment a week late & stilll be covered on your insurance!

Post # 16
Member
3041 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I wrote that real fast because usually you have to give 24 hour notice for them to stop the direct deposit in time (if that’s what you do).

Seems very odd they would hold the c/c payments for over a month, I’ve never heard of that. I’ve seen it take a few days or maybe a week tops for it to fully process. Check your bill from last month & make sure you weren’t double charged from your credit cards (that’s happened to me before, they accidentally run it through twice).

Also, check to see if your Verizon payment went through twice. Doesn’t hurt. AND if they did double charge you, which caused you to go negative, they (at least my bank does), waive any overdraft fee.

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