Post # 17
Rebecca- I suppose that’s one thing I’ve never understood – if it would be disrespectful after you’re married, why isn’t it disrespectful now? You’re clearly not a casual girlfriend at this point, he wants to marry you and spend the rest of his life with you. I understand if maybe that’s too personal a question – a lot of people don’t want to talk about the personal boundaries in their relationships and that’s totally fine. But to me, the relationship doesn’t magically change after saying "I Do" – yes the legal status changes, and other people’s perceptions of you may change, but you’re still the same people you were before the ceremony stared, except now you share the titles of husband and wife rather than fiance or boyfriend/girlfriend.
Post # 18
Guess I think that’s just one of the perks of marriage!
Post # 19
I agree. Even though you may have been living together since forever, there are people that say putting the ring on the girls finger changes her. Maybe this is an example of what they are talking about.
It makes no sense to me. If it’s ok to have the "ta-tas" in his face the day before the wedding, why is it such a big deal to do it after? That to me is an example of how the ring may change the girl, and thus lead to divorce. Don’t get me wrong, that one little change doesn’t lead to divorce, but why would you have different standards before and after a wedding? I think that would be asking for trouble.
Post # 20
I don’t want anyone else’s ta-tas in my man’s face except mine…before, during, or after the wedding. 😉
Post # 21
I don’t think you are being irrational at all. And you are far more lenient than I. I definitely want Fiance to get out and enjoy himself with his friends, but I have a very specific – nothing.is.to.go.down.within.7.days.of.the.wedding ruling.
Post # 22
my husband’s best man had called me a couple weeks before and i knew that they woudln’t be able to do anything until the weekend of (we got married on sunday). i told him that i didn’t really care what they did as long as they were all sober and on time for the wedding, and that it didn’t conflict with other plans (we had a big rehearsal dinner, and a party the night before that).
the guys are all relatively low key, and my hubby was uncomfortable w/ the strip club idea – his Bridesmaid or Best Man actually came up with a good idea to go to a winery nearby. unfortunately they didn’t have too much time so i still feel bad since my girls took me to nyc for a weekend.
i think if you’re comfortable with whatever they do, that’s great. but you also have a right to tell the best man (and your fiance) that they need to be home by a certain time AT THE LATEST for you to feel comfortable that they will be on time the next day. after all, it is one of the biggest days of your life (and his life for that matter) and the last thing you want is hungover new husband and groomsmen!!
Post # 23
Wow, I came back from a meeting to find that people who don’t know me have doomed my marriage to end in divorce! Seriously?!
So sorry to hijack the original thread, smt.