Post # 1
I was just wondering what everyone thought of this because I think it’s kind of strange and everyone I know does too. I know this girl, she got married in June of 2009. When she had a baby recently and we went to see her, we gave the front desk the last name and they said there was nobody by that name. So we gave her maiden name and were told where to go. I’m fine with not changing your name or hyphenating or whatever. But when we asked (because she does go by it socially, which I’d also be fine with), they both said that she did have intentions of legally changing her name. Her words then were, “I just haven’t really gotten around to it yet”. I thought a year was a long time to not have gotten around to something like that and you could tell he seemed frustrated because they expressed that they had talked about it before and she told him she wanted to legally change her name and all. Like I said, I think it’s fine either way, legal name change, social name change or none, but I just thought it was strange and was wondering if it was common to not change your name for a couple of years after the wedding when she still maintains she wants her name changed legally (I’m assuming if she didn’t get around to it before having a newborn baby she isn’t going to now but maybe I’m wrong).
Post # 3
I’ve been married since April and the only place I’ve changed my name is on Facebook! Granted I live abroad so dealing with everything based in the US (Social Security, DMV, bank accounts, etc…) is more of a hassle than it would be if I were living at home. I can see how it takes a while to ‘get around’ to it – it just doesn’t seem urgent in the day to day. But I would like to think I’d get it done once a baby is on his/her way…we shall see!
Post # 4
I guess I just thought it was strange because I understand your situation about living abroad but she was home quite a bit when she was pregnant (sometimes she’d take off whole days for a doctor’s appointment and sometimes she was just too tired or sick) and I would have thought that’d be a good time to do it if it was a doctor’s appointment day and she had half of a day free. I guess it’s just strange because it almost seems like he was excited for her to take his name and he doesn’t quite understand why she hasn’t done it yet. And in the hospital, he seemed frustrated that the baby didn’t have his last name until the birth certificate (Plus nobody could find them because they kept giving his last name).
Post # 5
Sometimes the name-change timing can be off. For example, I’m a notary for the next four years and if I change my name in that time frame, I simply have to give up that position- there is no name change option. If she has resumes floating around, that could sway the timing too.
Post # 6
@AnamCara: LOL I’ve only changed my name on Facebook too!
But I am waiting for the legal marriage certificate to come it from the government. Once that comes it, I’ll start changing it on everything. What a long process but I want to get it done asap.
Post # 7
One of my friends is in the same boat. They got married in Aug. 2008, had a baby in November 2009 and she finally legally changed her name in June 2010. Not sure what the hold up was, but that’s a dang long time to finally get the boat moving when she decided awhile back to change it. lol
Post # 8
I *want* to change my name but I just haven’t. There is no rush to do it, no pressing reason, so it’s something that just keeps moving further and further down my to-do list. This is to say, I get it. At some point, I’ll get around to it, but to some people, it’s just not a big deal. I had friends that couldn’t wait to change their names and it was one of the first things they did.
I figure I just want to get it done before my unborn children are ready for kindergarden. 🙂
@sulaii211: i don’t know where you are a notary, but I am one too and where I am I can submit a name change and pay more money, get a new seal and all of that, but I don’t lose my commission if I want to change my name.
Post # 9
It is prob going to take me forever to change mine b/c you have to go into the city and I dont drive there and the place is SCARY
Post # 10
Maybe she doesn’t want to take his name, and hasn’t found a way to tell him that yet. She might just be “putting it off” so she can avoid doing it until he gives up on the idea. Maybe not, but its another school of thought on the topic. And I agree with most others, there really isn’t a sense of urgency to it.
Post # 11
I got married in Juy 2009, and I didn’t get my name changed until early this year. I wanted to change it desperately, but there was an issue when I sent in my form right after the wedding, and I decided to just go to the social security office. I just never found the time, but I did eventually change it.
Oh, and though my name was changed when I had my daughter, I was stilll under my maiden name at the hospital, because I just can’t get in touch with my insurance to get it changed. I had to have her birth certificate fixed because of this.
Post # 12
I haven’t done it yet because it’s expensive and a pain in the a$$. Also like others have said there is no pressing need so it does get pushed down on the to-do list. I am excited to change my last name, but not desparate to get it done if that makes sense.
Post # 13
I’m not married yet so it’s hard to say, but I guess with the baby coming and everything, it probably got pushed off for your friend.
Question though…does that mean that the parents have two different last names on the baby’s birth certificate? That would bother me!
Post # 14
I guess I could see where it wasn’t a sense of urgency. I guess my thing with her was if you have the time and resources, why not? And I don’t know about the birth certificate and how that works. I know all her hospital stuff had her maiden name on it but I don’t know if she signs her married name on the birth certificate even though it isn’t legal or has to sign her legal name.