Post # 1
I wrote a post earlier about the problems with the venue right now.
I was really stressing at first trying to find a venue, once I got one I was so much better. Now that I’m having these issues and doubts, I just feel like giving up. I don’t want to look at any more venues, I feel like I have searched and there is nothing left.
Doing all of this by myself is stressing me out. It has nothing to do with my Fiance, I am having no doubts about being with him. Some of my family have already bought their tickets and booked a house.
I just don’t want to do it anymore. I don’t have much left in me, and it has barely started. I feel like I’m not getting enough help. I just want it to go away.
Post # 3
does anyone else get really stressed out and want it to hurry up and be done?
Post # 4
This is not new to many. It can be very stressful and there are many emotions involved. Have you considered hiring a planner? Don’t look at it as an extra expense…..a planner can help you save in many areas and that will help cover their fees.
If not a very organized, professional, and trustworthy friend.
Hang in there…just try to stay on top of everything as much as possible and there may be times you just have to take a few days. Remeber to have fun and also relax during the process.
Wishing you the best 🙂
Post # 5
@manders83: (((hug))) just walk away for a couple of days… there isn’t anything that won’t keep. Once you’ve got the venue, everything else is really just details. I know what you mean, though.
Post # 6
Yes, absolutely. I HATED finding a venue. It was so stressful, that I would break down and cry and have stress dreams and nightmares. I’d say, I just started this but I don’t want to do this anymore! Now that we finally found a place that’s a good fit, I feel so much better.
You WILL find something that works for you. Just give it a little bit of time. Maybe take a break. Do you have anyone that can help you search? Sisters, cousins, friends, etc?
Post # 7
@Prestigious Occasions: I have thought about a planner. This might be a dumb question, but do I have to pay just to consult with them? I want to know if they can do what I want first before I pay them.
@MrsLongcoatPeacoat: thank you! that’s just it though, I feel I don’t have a lot to choose from, and I have had to give up things I want for family. I’m afraid I’m going to end up somewhere and be unhappy and resent people for it
@MissTaken: I know that feeling, of when you find something you feel so much better. I did.. it helped.. and now, with my doubts and this stupid lady that won’t get back to me, is stressing me even more! I already sent my save the dates out, and told people where it was. I feel like I’m going backwards, and I don’t want to look anymore.
We moved here (Kauai) from Florida a year ago, all my family is on the mainland. They can only help so much, which (to be honest) is more just opinions than anything else. So no.. I have no one helping just me which makes it worse. 🙁
Post # 8
oh good lord sweetheart, I HATE wedding planning my own wedding. its so hard and stressful. not fun like everyone says. I cry and snip at my Fi all the time. ugh. what a mess. I even walk away for a week at a time and as soon as I jump back in it stresses me out. bleh. sorry hun 🙁
i also don’t have any help 🙁 my mom was diagnosed with cancer right after we got engaged and I know she wants to help a bit but with all shes going through I can’t bring myself to add that stress to her. and not to mention our budget is like, $7000 MAX. I can’t even have a photographer unless its a family friend and the photography is the MOST important part to me 🙁 Idk what to do. so sad…
Post # 9
@BLeighVicious: i’m sorry to hear about your mom 🙁 I would be the same way though, not wanting to add stress on her. It’s nice to know other people feel this way. I will walk away, even for a couple days.. come back and same thing (like you said).
Mt Fiance is only so much help. He will say he will do something and forget. I know I am going to end up doing it all. I can’t find a wedding planner that I like, and I don’t know if I can talk to them first without paying for a consultation.
I know what you mean about the photography.. between that and the food, those are the important things to me. Maybe if you save money in other aspects of the wedding, you can afford the photographer. I have been trying to do the same with saving money on certain things.
Post # 10
Finding the venue has so far been the most stressful bit for me. Our wedding is not until September 2012 but everywhere was already getting booked up for that time a couple of months ago.
We saw loads of venues and some I liked but my fiance didn’t, some he liked and I didn’t, some we both liked but couldn’t afford. We eventually found one that was not only amazing value for money but was a new building that was just beautiful, especially for the money.
But the problem was they had no dates on any Friday’s or Saturday’s (our preferred days) for the whole of Septmeber, or even early October. They only had Thursdays and Sundays. So we settled for a Sunday.
THEN I had some problems with rudeness from the staff and a slack wedding coordinator which nearly put me off. I eventually scheduled a meeting with the wedding coordinator and after realising my concerns she was far more helpful. The other staff I will not have to deal with. I can tell you now, after that meeting I felt A LOT better and can actually start looking forward to planning it.
The venue seems to be a really stressful part, and the part where a lot of people feel like throwing in the towel, it can be so disheartening when the ideal venue, both to your taste and budget doesn’t just pop up when you need it. But you’ll find it!
I actually have to find another venue soon, as we’re having 2 ceremonies due to our different cultural backgrounds…..but I’m leaving that to him and his family…I cannot do it again aaaaggggghhh! 😉
Post # 11
@Spoonie: That’s what happened to me… I wrote another post about this.. The coordinator was VERY helpful… until I gave her money. Th last thing she told me was that I would get the vendors information and the info about prices and everything at the end of the week.
That was on the 15th. After I wrote her another email (this past monday, 22nd), I have heard absolutely nothing. NOTHING … I have not heard from this lady in almost a week!
I felt a big weight lifted off my shoulder the second we booked the venue.. but then after my doubts and her not contacting me.. it’s making me want to flip the f out. I feel like I went backwards. I just want that feeling back of having the venue.
I contacted a couple coordinators last night and will hopefully find a better venue. Like one girl said to me on here… it’s better to be out the $500 than to be out the price of the wedding for being unhappy with it.
Post # 12
@manders83 The coordinator that accepted your retainer that you paid her should deliver the service point blank! With that said what services did you book her for? Is there a contract in place?
Ladies ANY coordinator that you book professional or the “professional” (aspiring planner that planned 1 or 2 small events) be sure to get a contract with them. This is your wedding and it is very important to you. If she cannot provide the client services and understand that you have never planned a wedding before…..this is not the planner/coordinator for you.
@manders83 Please PM me if you have any questions I am more than willing to answer them for you and assist you with getting things on track and tips for the retained coordinator. Of course I am in the MD area but we can communicate via email.