I JUST WANT TO VENT – My MIL and SIL drive me crazyyyyyy

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
1090 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

hopefulmothertobee :  eeeeekkkk…

Maybe you guys need some distance from them? Or maybe you need to be 100% honest with your hubs about how you feel? I know you said you don’t like to start the drama..but you’re not. You’re just making your feelings known to your partner.

Post # 3
Member
9903 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

I think you and your Darling Husband should be distancing yourself from them. Actually, I’d be cutting them off completely until there is an apology and change in attitude and even then contact would be limited. 

Post # 4
Member
21 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2017

hopefulmothertobee :  Wow! I am so sorry. Congrats! I would try not to communicate with these two wonder twins if you dont have to. I always call people wonder twins when there is a dumb duo. They both sound a little out there and nuts. Nobody can tell you not to get pregnant especially after you are pregnant. Also nobody but you and your husband should pick the baby’s name. You should pick whatever you want. I would try to ignore them as much as possible. I would also tell your husband when it gets really bad. I know you dont want to start a battle but if it gets bad speak up.  Telling you what you can and cant name your baby is over the top. I would not be rushing to name the baby after anyone in their family lol. IDK It is totally up to you though obviously. They just sound like they will take things to a new level if they are involved or a family name is involved. I hope you do get sometime to relax and enjoy this wonderful moment.

As far as the 1950s women stay at home. Men work. I would tell them straight out lady this is not the 1950s and laugh. If the Mother-In-Law told me my husband likes this type of food I would reply with oh maybe you should give HIM the recipe lol. Stuff like that. IDK I guess ignore what you can and give a weird remark back once in a while. They are both acting mean and foolish. They are probably just jealous because they are not really as important anymore to your husband as they used to be. Like they are not the main focus. The focus is you and the child. Not granny and sis. stirring up trouble. So they are probably just jealous that you have your own little family and they are stuck in the past. It is actually kind of sad. I feel bad for you though that is tough.

Post # 5
Member
10121 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

Oh lawd. Okay, you have every right to bitch on this one.

Post # 8
Member
731 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

hopefulmothertobee :  

I think you need to be a grey rock about things w ur Mother-In-Law. She is obviously crazy and over the top.  So stop telling her stuff. If she asks why you aren’t drinking, it’s cuz u really like this water (or this water is vodka 😉 ). Take two steps back from this family and let your dh deal with the crazy. Only provide one word answers and tell your Mother-In-Law everything is a “suprise” or its dh’s decision, or dh will tell her if she presses. It’s really the only way to save your sanity with toxic people.

 

Remember your MIL’S crazy behavior has very little  to do dwith you. It’s that you married your Darling Husband. She would be this crazy with anyone else, she is just picking on you about things like career because it’s a low blow and she wants to “hurt” you because you took her son “away”.

Post # 9
Member
1090 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

hopefulmothertobee :  Maybe he just has to understand that he can’t call them for every little thing?

At least he stands up for you! That’s very nice of him to do that.

Post # 10
Member
3841 posts
Honey bee

I second being a grey rock. Don’t engage them. Don’t tell them anything. Learn to bean dip and let all communication go through your husband. He should deal with his crazy and you yours.

Oh, and go read DWIL Nation or the gentler All in the Family on Babycenter before you get pregnant so they don’t ruin your pregnancy and postpartum time.

p.s. personally, I would put them on an extended time out. But I can see you are nowhere near ready for that.

Post # 11
Member
7882 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

Maybe Im just PMsing right now but I’d take that list of names and write back and say “these are the names we are considering”- making sure that at least 50% of the names overlap. It might be kind of fun to see them go insane.

Post # 12
Member
3841 posts
Honey bee

Btw, your baby does not share your blood stream in the first weeks so it is okay to have a drink while TTC.

Post # 13
Member
551 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

hopefulmothertobee :  “SIL and Mother-In-Law text me in a group text all of the names SIL would like to reserve for her future chidren, which we are not allowed to use. ONE of which is my DH’s name.”

I’ve officially heard it all. What does your husband think about this?? It sounds like a fair amount of distance is in order so they don’t make your lives miserable.

Post # 14
Member
9903 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

zl27 :  She’s not TTC. She is already pregnant just not ready to share the news (for obvious reasons) with her in-laws.

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