(Closed) I know I'm not alone…share your cooking fails

posted 6 years ago in Cooking
Post # 77
1780 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@chasesgirl:  I have done this too….with ironically a lemon pound cake….took me FOREVER to clean that train wreck up….all Fiance could do was laugh!

Post # 78
3773 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

…I may or may not have forgot to take the foil wrap off of the soft taco shells before turning on the microwave. Maybe.

Post # 79
1274 posts
Bumble bee

You know how you aren’t supposed to add cold or hot liquids to pyrex dishes – a.k.a. shocking temperature changes? I didn’t know that, until last year. I knew you were supposed to make sure the oven was 100% preheated before using it…but that’s as far as my knowledge went.


Pork loin about 20 minutes away from being done, seasoned beautifully with apple chunks for flavour. I was a bit worried it would get too dry within the next 20 minutes. And added like two teaspoons of water to the dish. 


Guess what happens? Your stove sounds like it has blown up and you have glass shards EVERYWHERE. So thankful Fiance got a shopvac for christmas! 


Lesson learned. 


Post # 80
186 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Blue Horse Farm

@happyheidi1984:  I second what belladee said!  You really have to have low and slow heat… and patience!  It’s hard for me to make grilled cheese because I hate waiting, but it’s worth it 🙂

Post # 81
2493 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

My first attempt at pecan pie the other night wasn’t too successful. The taste is great, but the texture is off.. it’s kind of gritty/scrambled-eggy. Darling Husband says there are too many eggs (I followed a recipe!) and/or I baked it too long. *sigh*.

Post # 82
718 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@allyfally:  I’ve done the forgotten pasta pot too! I’ve also left the pasta/rice/other boiled item in there and forgotten, only to find it all stuck to the bottom…

Same with gravy, and generally I have issues with sauce and soup consistencies. Lots of watery soups and overly thick sauces, I just can never add enough flour or corn starch.

One of the worst things I’ve made was a carrot orange ginger soup that sounded so good and I added too much orange juice so it was essentially a bowl of warm orange juice with carrot flakes in it. Yeah it was GROSS.

Post # 82
1812 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

My fail was while making creamy asperagus soup. It’s one of my go to meals and is amazingly good! Well I was chopping away, blending the asperagus, adding ingredients like a pro. I sliced up some French bread for dipping, arranged it all pretty, and brought it in to Darling Husband. I set it down in front of him and suddenly a weird shaped thing floats to the top of his bowl. He grabs it with his spoon and it’s a RUBBER BAND from the asperagus!! I must have swept it in the pot with the vegetables, it was in there the entire time! He just fished it out and ate the rest of the soup but I called my mom after to tell her the story and she could barely get air she was laughing so hard. 😀


the absolute best story though, is my really good friend. She is a self proclaimed terrible cook, and in college had the worst oops ever with DELIVERY PIZZA. (yeah, I know)

she was SURE her roommate said that reheating delivery pizza in the oven made it better and it didn’t get so soggy Like it does in the microwave. so she threw the cardboard box with the pizza in the oven. She was also SURE that her roommate put the oven on broil. Soooo ten minutes later she smells something burning and is mad that she overheated her pizza. She goes to check on it, and four foot flames shoot out of the oven! In her panic, she remembers that you can’t put water on a kitchen fire (grease fire really, but she wasn’t thinking clearly) So she shuts the oven door and calls her roommates frantically but no one answers. She searched high and low for the fire extinguisher, but couldn’t find it. Shes really panicking now, but didn’t want to call the fire department over delivery pizza, so she checks the oven again. the flames are even higher and so she just grabs a bucket of water and throws it on the fire, saving the kitchen. 

Later, they all asked why she didn’t just use the fire extinguisher. Apparently it was on the wall right next to the phone she was using to call her roommates!!! Haha!

Post # 83
643 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

littlemisst08: years ago, when I had my first apartment and didn’t have a CLUE about cooking but thought I’d figure it out as I went along I started heating up some oil in a skillet. Well, apparently I had the heat to high cause next thing I know it’s on fire and my dumbass panicked and threw WATER on it!!!! WORST MISTAKE EVER!! A HUGE fireball filled the kitchen, murdered my eyebrows and eyelashes and scorched all the cabinets. Needless to say I never did that again lol 😛 At least I can laugh about it now haha

  • This reply was modified 5 years, 6 months ago by  RedheadMeggs.
Post # 84
9544 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

I have had many, many kitchen fails.

The most frequent is probably microwave popcorn. I burn it about half the time. 

Just last week I put a bunch of cut up chicken in a pan of hot oil and tried to stir them too quickly and they were stuck to the bottom of the pan, so I panicked and scraped them off and was busily scraping the black bits off the bottom when my husband informed me that if I’d just left them for a minute they would have slid off without burning. 

This one isn’t mine but my husband wans making one of those frozen meal in a bag things and we often bulk those up with extra frozen veggies. We had run out of our usual veggies, so he decided to add okra and the entire dish turned into a giant bown of slime. It was awful. 

Post # 85
5954 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

beachbride1216:  I once messed up jello, too, but not sure how you burned it. Lol!

littlemisst08:  Ooooh so many….

Lentil soup, last step, put in blender. Well the heat from the soup made the lid not fit right, lentil soup on walls, ceiling, me.

Some dish that called for fresh jalapeno. I sliced it down the middle and proceeded to scoop the seeds (the hot part) out with my thumb. If you know anything about cooking you will know what comes next. I was burned! Not bad enough to require medical attention, but I had to sleep with my hand on ice all.night.long.

And one more. Thai noodles with peanut sauce. Waaaaay too much peanut butter. So unless you like peanut butter gooped all over your noodles, this is not the dish for you. Gag.

So so so many more! But also some successes!

Post # 86
963 posts
Busy bee

This thread is awesome!! 

I messed up apple crisp once. I think it was the crumbled topping on top, I was suppose to mix with 1/2 cup of butter. I misread it to say 1 cup. So it was VERY buttery. Darling Husband said it tasted fine, and he ate it over the next week. I was embarrassed, I thought it was awful. 


Post # 87
9134 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

MrsGatito:  I cut up some apples for an apple crisp at Christmas and somehow I missed the hard bits around the cores.  It was awful!

Post # 88
1660 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

happyheidi1984:  eating grilled cheese right this second… like BellaDee:  said, low heat and patience… I butter one side, put that in the pan on medium, put two slices of thin sliced cheese (I use deli sliced cheese, not singles, it melts better and tastes WAY better) on top, then I put a lid on the pan, the steam helps melt the cheese, once it starts to melt I put the other buttered slice on, and squish it (this part is controversial), let sit a few more minutes and check for brownness then flip. perfect every time!

Post # 90
1047 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

We had friends round for dinner last weekend, and I made dessert. I’ve got this fantastic flourless chocolate cake recipe that has turned out great before, so I was pretty confident. But for some reason I forgot to test it when it came out of the oven, and when I went to slice it, it was molten. I tried putting it back in the oven, but it refused to set. Luckily someone else had also brought cake, so we had that instead. 


On the plus side, I stuck it in the fridge and the next day it had kind of solidified – bit funny looking but it tasted amazing. And more for me!


Oh, and the best grilled cheese I’ve ever made – toast the bread, butter it, grate cheddar over it but leave it open faced. Put it under a medium grill until the cheese starts to melt, then add some prosciutto and sun dried tomatoes (I make homemade ones with rosemary and garlic – sooo good), and pop back under the grill until the cheese starts getting brown around the edges. 

  • This reply was modified 5 years, 6 months ago by  .
Post # 91
2492 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

once instead of putting 1/3 cup of oil into brownie mix, I added 3 whole cups. they were a greasy mess! Why I thought 3 cups was right, I have no idea

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