(Closed) I know I'm not my mom's favorite, but DAMN.

posted 4 years ago in The Lounge
  • poll: How would you feel if this happened to you?
    Fine, I don't care, I'm a big girl and I can do it myself. : (14 votes)
    7 %
    Meh, it hurts a little but I'm not going to cry over it. : (28 votes)
    14 %
    How rude. Seriously, do you even LIKE me, mom? : (123 votes)
    63 %
    I'd cry my eyes out. : (31 votes)
    16 %
  • Post # 3
    3283 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    Whaat?! I would be absolutely livid.

    Just to clarify, you had previously agreed that she would come, right? You didn’t like text her at 12:50 saying, “Hey, want to come to this thing right now?”

    If you had previously agreed, I would give her such a blistering set-down her ass would be burnin for weeks. Lol, but that’s just me.

    Post # 5
    2565 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    Sorry, that really stinks. 🙁

    Like a PP asked, you’d asked her previously and not right at 12:50?  I’d be friggin hurt.

    Post # 6
    11167 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper

    @DaneLady:  I am so very sorry hun! As someone who has a rather toxic relationship with her mother I can relate. I applaud you for taking the emotional leap to reach out and include her and get your hopes up. It is hard to write people off entirely especially when they are family and most certainly when they are parents.

    I have to say that if it were it me and something that important I would have remembered, would have been awake and would have been present. Sometimes people don’t know what is really important when they let their personal issues get in the way.

    Again I am sorry and I hope that you can find a way to not take it personally. It is her baggage, not yours.

    Post # 7
    3195 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @DaneLady:  i would be pissed too. i’d probably tell her what i thought about her. some mom…

    Post # 8
    2351 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2014

    @DaneLady:  See, I’m an only child and can’t get AWAYYY from my mom!!  But if she ever did anything like that to me, I’d go bat shit crazy!!

    HELL no!!  Are you going to tell her she’s an asshole for ditching you????  WHO SLEEPS TIL 1:15 PM!??!?!

    Post # 9
    981 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I’m really sorry. That is crappy and hurtful and she owes you a real apology.

    Maybe though, in her head, she thinks your brother can’t function without her support but she thinks of you as grown-up and independent and not needing her. (Not an excuse for her terrible behavior, just trying to think up what might motivate it)

    Post # 13
    959 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    I would flat out tell her. “Mom, I am really disappointed that you broke your commitment to me and didn’t come to my appointment. You make me feel like I am not a priority in your life.”

    If she says something that makes her sound open to suggestions, you can say “Could you let me know in advance the next time you can’t make it to something so important?”

    However, she may not react taht well, but at least you made an effort.

    Post # 14
    234 posts
    Helper bee

    I feel you!!! I would be very upset. My mother is always “helping” or going above and beyond with my sister(22 yrs old) who can’t get her life together. Yes, I’ve never needed anyone to bail me out because I’m the oldest and have always bailed myself out of anything but it does sting when you need your mom there and they just don’t out the effort in. totally understand you. I’ve come to realize I’m not her #1 priorty and I don’t let it hurt me like it use to. It stings to say this but you can’t force anything as much as you really want it.

    I would talk to her about it. How some things might not be as big of deal to her but they are very important to you

    Post # 15
    9689 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2012

    @DaneLady:  🙁  So sorry that happened to you.  Maybe she just really didn’t get how important that was to you?  There’s no excuse for what she did, but maybe tell her how you feel and that you’d like a closer relationship with her. 

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