(Closed) I know it shouldn’t bother me…but it does. (Really long, I’m sorry :)

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
3125 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

Don’t let any of that childish stuff get in your way.. Just ask who you want and move on. It’s all a lot of kid stuff that you’ll forget about in 5 minutes anyway! You may not think so, but you will!

Post # 4
Member
2289 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

If you really want this girl in your life, you’ll need to get everything out in the open. It sounds like you never talked about the fooling around, and that’s what’s still festering. Come clean about everything you’re feeling in a non-confrontational way, and see where it goes from there.

Post # 5
Member
555 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

First, I say don’t beat yourself up for how you feel.  Everyone has problems but that doesn’t make yours any less significant.  Personally, I would avoid the drama and invite both but don’t ask them to be Bridesmaid or Best Man.  It’s your day and you shouldn’t have to be so consumed with pleasing everyone because at the end of the day that’s impossible anyway.  If you feel like you MUST include them, I’d just say the heck with it and ask them both since they hang out a lot and can hopefully entertain one another and stay out of past drama.  I’d have a heart to heart with them both at the same time and agree to put the past in the past and start fresh.  Anyone who genuinely cares about you would agree and if they can’t then it’s time to move on. 

Post # 6
Member
396 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

I guess we don’t really know the full story of everything that has happened. But it sounds like to me that you were upset with BFF because she cheated with your Boyfriend or Best Friend. To me I think she’s in the wrong; but it also sounds like you’ve forgaven her (but never talked about it?) As for Auntie; do you still have a relationship with her? do you still talk to her? I don’t have much advice i guess. Do you still carry on REAL relationships with either of them? (outside of facebook) If you want them involved then I’d say ask them. If they feel weird about it they’ll probably turn down the invite.

Post # 7
Member
3125 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

i will say i thought about my response, and though it’s still what i mean, i think that mainly what i’m trying to say is that all of your issues come from not being open with your feelings. If you don’t tell anybody what you’re thinking, then you are left with silence and question marks. Maybe learn from this and just be up front with what you think to save yourself the heartbreak and wondering what other people think/feel etc. Take 2 minutes, ask, and move forward.

Post # 8
Member
2201 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I don’t know – I think it’s pretty clear from xBFF’s actions (at least from the Spark Notes version above) that she no longer views you guys as having a real relationship. I personally would feel weird being asked to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man after all that went down. I think you need to develop a real friendship again before it would make sense to ask either your Auntie or xBFF to be in the wedding.

How would you feel in 3 months if neither of them are participating in wedding activities or everything remains the same as it is? Would you still want them in your wedding?

The topic ‘I know it shouldn’t bother me…but it does. (Really long, I’m sorry :)’ is closed to new replies.

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