- 9 years ago
- Wedding: May 2011
::sigh:: I just need to vent. And this is gonna be a long one, darlings; so I apologize in advance. The beginnings aren’t going to make a whole lot of sense; but it’ll all come together. (I think, lol.)
I’ll try to give you the SparkNotes version of this…I lived with super-cool Auntie while in college; xBFF was my best, best friend (until I met my wonderful Fiance, of course =]. ) I wanted to live with xBFF after I graduated, so I gave Auntie plenty of notice. She said she wouldn’t find someone to take my spot until xBFF and I found a place. 1 month before graduation, Auntie says her boyfriend is moving into my room and I need to be out before June 1; Graduation is May 31. UGH.
Eventually, after many bumps in the road, xBFF and I are finally roommates! At that time I was dating a guy named *Thomas. Another long story short, I found out Thomas and xBFF messed around. For some stupid reason, I thought xBFF would come clean about it, so I never approached her about it. (I know Thomas instigated it.) She never did. I was too hurt and angry to talk to her about it, so I was dumb and let it steep for weeks and weeks. Then I met my Fiance, we were instantly crazy about eachother, and Fiance invited me to live with him. (It was a better financial situation anyway.) So I moved out. And xBFF and I grew apart. We were trash-talking eachother behind one another’s backs because we were both hurt and wanted to lash out.
About a year after dating, Fiance and I want to move out of NY back to my home state. 🙂 We worked in the same place and had many mutual friends. As one last hurrah, we threw a Farewell Party at our apartment. We did the whole Facebook invite page thing mainly for the people we work with so they would have directions to the place and know what to bring, etc. We wanted anyone and everyone to come to the party. I invited xBFF but she didn’t come. And a part of me wanted to invite Auntie, but…well, she wouldn’t have known anyone except for me, and I would have been too busy going around, saying my goodbyes and having drinks. So because I didn’t send Auntie an invite directly, she took it personally. She left me a short comment of FB that stung quite a bit. I didn’t reply, because I knew she had our address AND she saw the event page; and if she read closely, she could have seen that everyone was welcome to come.
Okay, back to present time…Recently I’ve been going on FB a lot to get in touch with people regarding the wedding. 🙂 And I see that Auntie and xBFF are hanging out ALL the time. Auntie didn’t congradulate Fiance and I on our engagement, and xBFF only left a short: “congrats” on my wall. She couldn’t even write out the word… 🙁
I’m more sad with xBFF than Auntie. (Auntie’s actions are justifiable; she’s a whole other story.) I’ve tried making ammends with xBFF, but she keeps telling me “There’s nothing to fix. You’re over-analyzing and you’re too emotional.” I wanted her to be one of my BM’s because she’s played such a significant role in my life and I want her beside me on that day. I just fear she won’t be geniune in her well wishes, if that makes any sense. Almost like..she’d be forced to stand up there for someone she despises. And then I’m afraid if I don’t make her a Bridesmaid or Best Man, she’ll be offended. The same scenario with Auntie, too. My sister made Auntie a Bridesmaid or Best Man for her wedding; I’m worried if I don’t make Auntie a Bridesmaid or Best Man, that’ll be the final nail in the coffin, if you will…
::sigh:: I don’t know…I know this was unbearably long, and I apologize. I feel like I’m crying over spilt milk when there are plenty of other bees with exponentially worse problems.