Post # 1
And, yup, I’m going anonymous with this because it is so pathetic but it is really bothering me that….
my ex is getting married before me after getting engaged after me. Yup, I don’t care that he got engaged…it just bothers me that they are getting married before me…
four days before my birthday….
at a place that I first took him to.
The hits just keep on coming! For reference, I got engaged in Feb and am getting married this fall. He got engaged this fall and is getting married this summer.
Why does this bother me so much??
Post # 3
I felt like that about certain people too. We had a long engagement and I hated that a lot of people got engaged after us and got married before us. Some kind of marital jealousy thing I guess?
Post # 4
Well, no matter what, it is a little strange that they are getting married somewhere that has significance to the two of you.
I think the hard part is letting go. Not that you still have feeling for him…that isn’t what I am saying. But I think sometimes we have trouble letting go of the past, and for him to be getting married so close to your birthday in a place that you two shared together indicates how his life has moved on. And sometimes it is hard for us to be moved on from, even if we don’t even want to be with that person.
Try not to let it bother you. Just think about how in love you are with your fiance, and how your marriage to him is truly the only thing that matters! 🙂
Post # 5
MissAsB: It’s hard not to be jealous! By the time my Fiance and I are married, we’ll have been together for six years. I know lots of people who are engaged and married in less than two. It does seem like it’s not fair sometimes!
I just try to remind myself it isn’t a competition, but I do feel like I’ve paid my dues and it sometimes bugs me when it comes so much more easily to others!
Post # 6
Let it go. I know it can be difficult to compare yourself and your current relationship status or marriage status to an ex, but don’t do it. You don’t gain anything from it and neither does he. The more you start thinking about it, the more you will stress about it and who cares? You have found the man you want to marry – someone other than your ex. When you start thinking about your ex and what irks you about him getting married first, just remember why you two broke up and how happy you are with your fiance.
Post # 7
Ya know, I think this is where boys and girls differ. I would never get married at a place I went to with my ex and I would make sure it wasn’t near his birthday/our anniversary/any day of meaning. But guys don’t think like that.
I don’t blame you for being a little ruffled about this. I was when my ex got engaged before me and was to be married before me… they called off the wedding and broke up though.
Just remember, it’s better to be solid and not rushed into a lifetime commitment. So you win too!!
Post # 8
Thanks everyone! I think it was a little offsetting because I found out the date of the wedding and the location at the same time so it was kind of like a one, two punch…ya know? And, it *almost* feels like ….well, this would have been the wedding I would have had if we would have stayed together. I mean….probably not, but still.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my fiance, but I have to be honest when I say it did ruffle my feathers a little.
Oh, and I agree, Champange Wishes… I would never get married somewhere that held significance with an ex, too weird, no matter how long we’ve been apart.