(Closed) I know it’s pathetic, but I can’t help it!

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I felt like that about certain people too.  We had a long engagement and I hated that a lot of people got engaged after us and got married before us.  Some kind of marital jealousy thing I guess?

Post # 4
16213 posts
Honey Beekeeper

Well, no matter what, it is a little strange that they are getting married somewhere that has significance to the two of you.

I think the hard part is letting go. Not that you still have feeling for him…that isn’t what I am saying. But I think sometimes we have trouble letting go of the past, and for him to be getting married so close to your birthday in a place that you two shared together indicates how his life has moved on. And sometimes it is hard for us to be moved on from, even if we don’t even want to be with that person.

Try not to let it bother you. Just think about how in love you are with your fiance, and how your marriage to him is truly the only thing that matters! 🙂

Post # 5
16213 posts
Honey Beekeeper

MissAsB: It’s hard not to be jealous! By the time my Fiance and I are married, we’ll have been together for six years. I know lots of people who are engaged and married in less than two. It does seem like it’s not fair sometimes!

I just try to remind myself it isn’t a competition, but I do feel like I’ve paid my dues and it sometimes bugs me when it comes so much more easily to others!

Post # 6
1510 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Let it go. I know it can be difficult to compare yourself and your current relationship status or marriage status to an ex, but don’t do it.  You don’t gain anything from it and neither does he.  The more you start thinking about it, the more you will stress about it and who cares?   You have found the man you want to marry – someone other than your ex.  When you start thinking about your ex and what irks you about him getting married first, just remember why you two broke up and how happy you are with your fiance.

Post # 7
606 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Ya know, I think this is where boys and girls differ.  I would never get married at a place I went to with my ex and I would make sure it wasn’t near his birthday/our anniversary/any day of meaning.  But guys don’t think like that. 

I don’t blame you for being a little ruffled about this.  I was when my ex got engaged before me and was to be married before me… they called off the wedding and broke up though.

Just remember, it’s better to be solid and not rushed into a lifetime commitment.  So you win too!!

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