(Closed) I know this has been asked a lot, but…

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
1573 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I think you’re asking if it is still improper etiquette to give people your registry info in your invite, right?

Simple answer: yes, it is still improper. With that said….. Do people still do it? Yes!

Do people look down on it and think you’re a horrible etiquette rule breaker?  I don’t think so. So many people do it now that no one really gets bothered by it.  That’s my opinion.

Post # 4
Member
2641 posts
Sugar bee

It is pretty customary for registry info to be included on invitations for bridal showers.  So maybe your sister was mistaken when one of her registry places gave her little cards.  (Maybe they were actually meant for the shower invitations, not wedding invitations.)

But you are on the money about registry info on the wedding invitations.  That’s not considered proper etiquette.

Post # 5
Member
832 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2010

I’ve heard/read that it’s okay to put them in the invites for the bridal shower but not for the wedding invitation. Bed, Bath, & Beyond gave us like 300 cards and i have no idea what im gonna do with them. I would like to find a way to let everyone know where we’re registered, but i guess it kind of seems like “hey buy me things” when you send it with the invite.

Post # 6
Member
70 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I’m used to registry information being included in bridal shower invitations – but never the wedding invitation!

Post # 7
Member
282 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

Macy’s offered me registry cards. FWIW, I’d read in a couple of etiquette books that it is appropriate to list or include registry info in shower invites, but not in the wedding invitation.

Post # 9
Member
1740 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

i asked like 10 different women where i worked how to tell people about my registry and all of them said i should put a little card in the wedding invitation. to every baby shower and wedding i had been invited i had received a little card with the invitation for the registry. i like it because that way i know what are my options for a gift…

Post # 10
Member
2767 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

it is normal to include it for bs invites, but not acceptable for wedding invites.  I live in MN and I still see people include it in their wedding invites though.  I didn’t include it in ours and I remember my husband was upset.  He said his family would be annoyed they wouldn’t know where to buy us gifts.  Oh well, they just had to deal with it.

Post # 11
Member
2186 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

registry info SHOULD be included in BRIDAL SHOWER invitations, not WEDDING invitations.

the purpose of the shower is to shower the couple with gifts. the purpose of the wedding is to witness and celebrate.

technically you shouldnt ask for any gifts on the invitation because they are not expected really. (guests dont HAVE to bring a gift to the wedding)

this is according to traditional american wedding ettiquite. mind you there are some cultures that gift giving is part of the wedding etc or they include it in the invite, but if you are going traditional its only appropriate in teh bridal shower invite. you can post your registries on the wedding website though…. and put a link in a separate card in your invites to your wedding website “for more details”

Post # 13
Member
2408 posts
Buzzing bee

i’ve always received registry info cards with the invite for all the weddings i’ve been invited to so far. i thought that was the way it was done only to find out it’s not. i guess it just depends on what is common in your area/circle. i like receiving them with the invites because it’s one less thing for me to do [call around and ask where they’re registered].

Post # 14
Member
4765 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas

Technically it is considered bad etiquette, but MANY people do it. 

Post # 15
Member
461 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

My family is from the UP!

I get what you’re saying about the regional thing, but if you’re still worried about it then just put them in your bridal shower invites and spread it to the rest by word of mouth.  But if it’s the norm…I’d say just go with it.

I am told that buffets are less classy than plated dinners, and that you aren’t supposed to leave a space for how many people are coming on the rsvp cards, but out here buffets are the norm and if you don’t ask how many people on the rsvp cards, your count will probably be pretty off because people end up bringing other people.  I mean, even with the numbers on the rsvp cards our count will probably be wrong!  lol.

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