Post # 1

Member
36 posts
Newbee
Ok let me start off by saying that I am truly so grateful that my friends are throwing me a shower and I love them all for going out of their way to do so.
Ok there are seven hostesses for this shower. Well one of the girls was in charge of the invitations and that was her only responsibilty for the whole shower as I’ve been told by the other hostesses. She ordered the invitations and they were all mailed out last week. Well on my best friends got the invitation and it has my maiden name on it instead of my married name. It says “Please join us for a baby shower honoring Anna Maiden Name and Baby Married Name”. So our baby and I have different last names on this invitation which looks bizarre.
Then I find out that she also didn’t include where we are registered. I feel like a brat for being upset about this at all but it just makes me feel like I wasted all this time registering for nothing. Registering was a pain in the ass and I feel like if it wasn’t going to even be on the invitation in the first place I could have avoided it all together.
And last I didn’t get one of these invitations. I have literally thrown a million showers…everytime any one of my friends gets married or has baby I am one of the first ones to step up and offer to throw them one. I have always sent the guest of honor one of the invitations and I feel like it’s so strange that I didn’t get one. Out of everyone you would think that I’d be the first one to get one since the shower is in my honor you know?
Basically I’m annoyed bc this girl will be the first one to talk sh*t and judge other people on the most ridiculous things! I threw her a shower for her wedding and she talked crap about how I used paper plates and napkins. Ummm excuse me?? There were 60 people at your shower!! Who the hell has 60 matching plates??
I think that if it was anyone other than this girl I wouldn’t be so annoyed. But since she acts so high and mighty and acts like she never does anything wrong it really bugs me. I want her to realize that not everyone is perfect and people do make mistakes and it’s not the end of the freakin world.
Ok I think I’m done. Just basically wanted to vent. Thanks if you’ve gotten this far:)
Post # 3

Member
1269 posts
Bumble bee
Can you call her and ask about the name situation? That’s bizarre.
How will the RSVP’s work? If someone is receiving a call, could they pass the word along about where you are registered?
Post # 4

Member
6571 posts
Bee Keeper
My friends still accidently call me by my maiden name all the time, I wouldn’t take it personally, it’s’ just what they’re used to.
I’m sure people will call and ask where you’re registered. My mom put that info on the back of the invite for my shower, and many people didn’t turn it over so she got lots of calls and emails asking where I was registered.
She probably just didn’t realize that you would want something to put in the baby book or scrap book, just ask her if there are any extra invites.
Post # 5

Member
538 posts
Busy bee
I can understand why you are frustrated. I have a friend that can be difficult at times also and any time anything comes up with her its easy to get frustrated really easily.
The maiden name thing could have been a mistake. She should have taken more time to check her work. Sure you could flame her for it and make a big deal about it but maybe try to be the bigger person and let it go.
Not including the registration information really isn’t a required thing. She may have wanted to try to follow etiquette and not include it. Its really not a big deal to spread the information via word of mouth. Also, there are only so many baby stores, I’m sure most people will check at BRU.
I understand it would be nice to have an invitation for the scrapbook. Maybe ask her for one? Just say something like, I really loved how cute the invites are and I would love to put one in the baby book, do you have an extra? Maybe ask one of the other hostesses or your mom if you can have theirs if she doesn’t.
Post # 6

Member
1813 posts
Buzzing bee
I’ve actually heard it is bad etiquette to list where you are registered on the invite. At most, you should put it on a separate piece of paper in the invite. I’m sure the people who want to buy off the registry will ask when they RSVP, or you can set up a baby blog that has links to your registry.
I accidentally used my sister’s maiden name when announcing her at my reception, oops! I can see that it is weird when it is on paper to not realize it, though! Of course, as someone who kept her maiden name, I don’t think it looks weird to have 2 different names on their (mom & baby).
Post # 7

Member
3997 posts
Honey bee
The name situation would bug me so much! And I can see why it’s that much more annoying given her personality. Don’t let it bother you enough to taint your shower in any way though. The registry info is important to include but it’s all good. I’d ask your friends/family to spread the info for ya. It’ll work out 🙂
Post # 8

Member
243 posts
Helper bee
Yeah I’d totally be super annoyed by the name mixup. I mean it’s not rocket science!
But at this point the invites are out and there’s not much you can do. I would definitely bring it to her attention though, just try not to sound too pissed.
Post # 9

Member
3482 posts
Sugar bee
@cannotwait: I think registry etiquette is mainly an issue on wedding invitations and other situations where it’s the guest(s) of honour doing the inviting. Here, a party is being thrown by other people in her and her little bundle of joy’s honour, plus the point of a shower pretty much is gifts, so I don’t see the faux pas in having the registry info on there.
Post # 10

Member
110 posts
Blushing bee
I agree 100% with the OP, I would be annoyed too. I mean, I get they refer to you by your maiden name….but putting the baby married name on there? COME ON!!!! ugh, I feel frusturated for you