Post # 32
I think he’s having a hissy and being a baby. Fiance knows if he hid the ring from me I would hunt it down and wear it while he was gone. Tons of girls peek all the time!
Tell him how much you love it you couldn’t help it, he needs to get over it.
Post # 33
OP! Yikes! I would have personally have an issue with this tidbit….if he needs to work through a past proposal not working out–then he needs to go to therapy and NOT take this out on you!
Are you sure you want to be with someone like this? Please remember that you have feelings and a heart to worry about too!
Post # 34
Please don’t take this the wrong way (I am saying this out of concern), but I think YOU are the one that should be upset that he’s had a ring for 6 months and hasn’t proposed yet and doesn’t plan to until next summer. I think that is sort of cruel. If you two are on the same page and already have the ring, it should already be on your finger. Sounds like you two may have had some issues, but if you have worked through them, it’s time to move forward. This scenario seems to be creating even more tension.
I guess this hits a nerve with me because my SO told me that he doesn’t want to propose without a ring (which we think will take 4-6 weeks to be ready). I told him that was ridiculous if we already know what we want, so he should improvise with a ring pop in the meantime. I am not even joking…
Post # 35
Are you sure he wants to propose? Someone who has had the ring for 6 months and is contemplating waiting another 6+ months and gets this angry over something so petty and holds the proposal over your head…seems like someone who might be looking for an excuse to delay it or not do it at all.
Post # 36
See that’s the thing – it’s always been his suggestion! He brought it up earlier this year. We had spoken casually about it, like how many kids etc before, but he was the one who said he wanted to get married!
It’s only since he suggested it that it’s sunk it with me and I’ve been ‘waiting’ haha. I would happily wait another 3 years if needs be, I’m only young and there’s no rush when you’re going to spend the rest of your life together! But he has brought it up so much recently…. perhaps he needs to do the Shut up Pact!
Post # 37
SO and I had a big chat this lunchtime, and he feels the proposal/ring is a ‘hex’ (his choice of words) and he wants to delay it indefinitely so we can work on our relationship.
Whilst I feel that he has led me on, and toyed with my emotions, I’ve decided to give him one last chance, and work on our relationship without the pressure of an engagement hanging over me. Perhaps then he will stop pushing it back and back, and get his act together.
For this purpose I’m leaving the Bee for the forseeable future too.
Thank you all for your support since I’ve been on here – you’ve provided me with a lot to think about, and a lot of help and support. Hopefully in the future I will be back to actually announce an engagement!
Love to you all.
Post # 39
I’m so sorry to hear that you’re leaving the Bee and that your SO has delayed your proposal indefinitely
. I can’t say I quite understand why you’re putting up with his behavior, but I do hope that things work out the way you want them to and that you end up happy in the end.
Btw I voted “no” before I read your update because after taking everything into account I don’t think this situation should have been such a big deal that you had to justify your reasons for taking the picture. I agree with PP’s that your SO overreacted, and I believe he has continued to overreact now that I’ve read your update. I’m glad he apologized, and I hope that you two can work through things and build a stronger relationship together.
Post # 40
@kellym83: I don’t know if you’ve gotten your proposal yet, or if your SO has forgiven you or not, but I thought I’d send some words of encouragement your way.
I won’t lie, I didn’t read all the replies, but it doesn’t look to me like he said “don’t look at the ring” — in my opinion, if he didn’t want you to look at it, he should have said this with 100% certainty when he refused to hide the ring somewhere else. I also believe that if you go to your SO saying “if you did this simple thing (aka hide the ring) it would make my life so much easier” he should have done it.
I understand why he’s feeling hurt, but I do think he’s being a bit of a dramaqueen about it. I hope you guys have patched things up!