Post # 1
For the first time since this whole divorce process, I lost my shit. In public. At the UPS store.
The poor cashier was probably like really? Some keys and some medication? Really?
It wasn’t because I miss my ex because I don’t. I know this is the best decision for both of us in the long run and I don’t doubt it in any way. It wasn’t because I’m worried about money (took a 50% paycut with my job, I’m just thankful to be employed). Sure, it’s scary, but I will make it work. It’s not because I’m stressed, I am, but not to the point of breakdown. It’s not because all this change suddenly overwhelmed me.
It’s because I mailed my ex our dog’s medications and rabies tag to him. Am I crazy?
Something about being there and seeing the last two things that I had of hers be sent away… it all just hit me. She’s not mine anymore. I’m never going to see her again. Not because she’s dead, because in some ways, that may be easier, but because my ex has her and I don’t.
I feel like I’ve lost a part of my heart and soul. She was the first dog that I wholeheartedly loved. I miss her so much… I now look at my dog (the one that I walked away with) and I feel like she needs her doggy sister. Like she’s supposed to have her lab with her…Her big sister, her protector, her pillow, her rock, my rock, my baby… I dunno…maybe I’m just crazy and just grieving…I dunno…
I just need someone to tell me that the pain of losing a pet gets easier if it does. How did you overcome it? I feel like I can’t even look at another lab or talk about anything that reminds me of her without being set off into tears… God this hurts…
Post # 3
@ChuckNorris: I’m really sorry): Hugs to you! I have no advice just hang in there!
Post # 4
@ChuckNorris: Crying is ALWAYS an option…and I don’t care where I am…I’ve done it everywhere, because if you hold that shit in, it festers! If I had been in the UPS store with you, I would have hopped over that counter and cried with you, but that’s just me…if someone is crying, I’m joining in, I love a good cry.
I have lost some of the best dogs to ever roam this Earth, and I understand that the circumstances aren’t exactly the same, but the finality of it is…and it’s not something you get over, it just gets easier….
I’ve been out walking the 99 boys, and had someone ask if they can pet one of them, we start talking, they tell me about their lab, greyhound…pyrenese…whatever and before you know it we’re having a big cry fest in the park while they hug my dogs and white knuckle through the pain…but that’s ok, it’s part of the human experience, and I’d rather hurt to hell and back than feel nothing at all, because that means I’m not really alive anymore.
You’ll be ok, and your baby will be ok too….hang onto each other, it’s more than enough!
Post # 5
My heart goes out to you!! I would die if somebody ever took away my puppy. She is my child, my teacher, and my best friend.
Hugs to you!! make sure you go easy on yourself and do something nice for you.
Post # 6
I’m so sorry. 🙁 When I left my ex boyfriend, I’d been around the dog from day 1 for nearly 4 years, living with him and borderline obsessively loving him, and every time I thought about the idea that I’d never see the dog again, I freaking LOST MY SHIT. Tears, snot, mascara cheeks and all. It got easier as time went on, but if I come across a picture, I still can get teary eyed and it’s been nearly 5 years since I moved out!
Didn’t mean to ramble…but yeah, it’s okay to cry. Let it out. And hang in there, it’ll get better.
Post # 7
@figgnewton: Thank you for the hugs =) They mean a lot in this time of need =)
@Nona99: thank you for your completely amazing comment…as usual you know the right thing to say 😉 I have to confess that I AM totally scared (like petrified) to go on a walk for fear of seeing a lab because the last time I went on a run I saw a lab who looked just like my Ali and I nearly lost it…and I’m not sure that a complete stranger would be as nice as you and let me hug their dog….move near my neighborhood for a couple weeks so I can have one of those moments please??? lol. I’m going on two hours of solid hysterical crying right now, and I can tell it was much needed. I needed to hear that this reaction was normal…I just feel like I will never have another dog like Ali. She really was one of a kind. She was the best lab ever. And so beautiful…She was perfect =( UGH I hate this!!!!!
@Starling13: I felt the same way as you did when I still had her and now she’s gone…I felt like I would inflict pain on whoever took her from me…and now I don’t have her… =( hug your pup for me tonight okay??
@misspeanut: I’m so glad that someone else has the same reaction as I am having….it makes me feel much more normal….it’s exactly how I feel. Like I can’t even let my brain “go there” or I just lose it completely. =( I was with Ali from day 1 too and aside from a couple days of vacation, I never was away from her, I was her sole caretaker for almost three years. She was my baby, my pride and joy. I did EVERYTHING for her. Her monthly medications, all her vet appts, ears, toenails, coat, everything. I kept her lean and fit and walked her. She is my honey girl. I’m borderline attaching a photo so everyone sees how sweet her face is but I don’t know if I’m even ready to see her again…
Post # 8
@ChuckNorris: I’m so sorry, hun. Losing a pet in any way is so incredibly difficult. Time will make it easier. I know you don’t want to think about this now….but once some time passes, it *might* help you to get another dog (maybe even a lab) down the road. Just a thought…and one that I’m sure you’re not ready to consider right now. Either way, I’m sorry you’re going through this, and you’re still in my thoughts.
Post # 9
@ChuckNorris: Here’s the boy that mends those tattered shreds life rips out of us….Simba is the DUMBEST dog on Earth…unless someone needs that extra something…then for a brief and shining moment, he’s an intuitive and gentle creature leading someone confidently through the figurative brambles and back onto the path…then it all just fades away, and he’s a lunkhead again…for whatever it’s worth…maybe he works long distance….and he’s great for hangovers too…
Post # 10
@ChuckNorris: I’m sorry honey 🙁 The pain doesn’t go away, but feeling it becomes like a part of life and you sort of get used to it. We gave our boxer away to a good friend when my family moved from England to Canada. He was 12 and not in the best of health when we emmigrated, so it was unfair to put him through the stress of the trip and the bouncing around we did between family when we landed. I can tell you that to this very day I cannot think about the last day I had with him without crying – which is what I’m doing now as I type. Time does make it easier in some ways though. Remember that no matter the distance, you are her mama, and your souls will be tied together for ever.
XOXOXOX Much love and hugs, lovey! XOXOXOXOX
Post # 11
@ChuckNorris: (((HUGS))) It will get easier, I promise. What happened today was part of the grieving process and you will always miss your Ali. Things will remind you of her and you’ll wish she was with you. But, over time, those sad moments will also be paried with the wonderful memories of the moments you shared and the moments you cherish. Through the heart break you will also celebrate the wonderful dog she was to you. But, it sucks. FWIW, I’m a year into owning a rescue that I’m hopeless in love with. Whenever I think of her not being around (which is almost daily) I get choked up. When I see another dog that’s a similar breed, my heart leaps. It will likely be that way for you for a while and that’s ok. Allow yourself to cry and mourn the loss of your baby. And, I’m sorry you couldn’t keep both dogs. 🙁 Any chance your ex would turn her back to you??
Post # 12
Oh boy. Losing your doggy in any way is horrible. Cry it out sister, cry it out. Are you considering getting another (different & not replacing) baby? I know some people need time but I’m just curious if that’s your plan. Anyway, you’re going through A LOT- take it easy on yourself. And we will take care of you.
Post # 13
I’m so sorry 🙁 I BAWLED the day my ex took our cat. I was furious, even though I agrees to let him have him since he wasn’t child-friendly. It took awhile, and a lot of tears, to move on. But you will with a soft spot for her always. It just won’t have that sharp edge. Crying is important! It’s part of the grieving you have to do.
Post # 14
Hugs Im so sorry your going through this I honestly can imagine what your going through.
Post # 15
I’m so sorry you are going through this. I know the pain of losing a pet, although not this way. But I found crying and ice cream, lots of ice cream, coma inducing ice cream (and cake) helped to ease the pain.