Post # 1
I lost my job today. He has the ring. I know he was going to propose next month. Do you think he still will?
I hope I find something REALLY soon… Obviously if we were married, it’s something we’d face together and I’m sure he’ll help me out if I need it. But I have always been so independent in our relationship and I think that’s one of the qualities he loves about me.
Maybe he’ll just postpone until I find something else. I might be offered to stay on part-time until I find something which would help.
Bees, I’ve been crying like crazy since I got the news… what should I do?
Anybody know someone who is looking for a marketing/design person in Southbay Los Angeles?
Post # 3
Start applying for jobs like crazy! I don’t see how your job has anything to do with him proposing though. You may need to wait a bit longer to pay for a wedding or something, but I don’t think he would need to postpone proposing.
Post # 4
Why would he not want to marry you if you were laid off? That doesn’t make sense. Marriage = for better or for worse. Anyone can lose their job….if that changes how he feels about you, maybe him not proposing would be a blessing in disguise?
Post # 5
Thanks guys, I’m just freaking out. He’s already been super supportive. I guess I just feel worthless without a job. It’s weird, but so much of my self-worth is tied into it.
Already updating my resume and getting it out there. I might take the part-time offer to help with bills in the meantime.
Post # 6
Also I guess the other thing is it’s not like a “happy time” to get engaged if I’m out of work.
Post # 7
@DreamingofDiamonds: your SO definitely shouldn’t be basing wether he wants to marry you on wether you have a job or not! I would hope and assume that he loves you regardlwhat and whatever his plan is has nothing to do with your employment stAtus. That being said you are not worthless without a job, a job doesn’t define a human it’s just a job. You’re a person without it with feelings and worth! You’ll find something new im sure and whatever that is it will be meant to be the way it turns out! Keep your head up!
Post # 8
@MsJ2theZ: Thanks. I think I’m just in freak out mode. I appreciate all the support I get here. By The Way, saw you’re Washington, I’m originally from Seattle 🙂
SO just got home and he’s wonderful. Calming me down. Telling me “hey you know we’ll just postpone some trips and cut back on some things like going out. Even though these next couple months might be a little rough, it will be fine.” He really is fantastic. I’m just an irrational mess right now haha…
I’ve worked for this company since right out of college so it’s just hard to wrap my head around being essentially “laid off.” It had nothing to do with my performance – they are having to let me go for financial reasons. That’s why they’re willing to keep me on part-time until I find something else. I guess the silver lining is I’ve been meaning to look for a job with more growth potential, so maybe this is the kick I need.
SO has a volleyball game tonight but he promised to come right home to me after instead of going out with his buddies. In the meantime, I’m going to walk the dog to kind of get some fresh air and then get my resume together… sigh.
Post # 9
@DreamingofDiamonds: we just went through this…Fi was laid off 3 days before Christmas. It all worked out. Three months later he found an even betterjob and is way happier. It will work out, keep your chin up and smile!!
Post # 10
@DreamingofDiamonds: I am so sorry to hear the bad news! That is such a tough pill to swallow.
I don’t know your SO well enough to know if he will still propose (on schedule) or not, but I hope your job loss doesn’t affect it. I think it would be a different story if he hadn’t bought the ring yet, or if you were already engaged and setting a date for your wedding. Those things involve money, but getting a proposal at this point doesn’t. If he’s sure about marrying you, then a job loss is something you both face together regardless of your marital status.
Keep your chin up! I know this is so disappointing but don’t let this moment define you. You have not failed because you lost your job. You are simply encountering a hurdle, and you will find a way to get over it. All you need right now is a hug and a can-do attitude! Procure the first from your Fiance (I’d give one to you if I could) and find the second within you. You can do it!
Post # 11
It’s normal for your self esteem to take a hit when you lose a job if you’re used to working!
But his love for you will not change, and I definitely think he will still propose!
Post # 12
Oh my, I am sorry to hear you’re losing your full time job. It’s great they are keeping you on part-time until you find something. It helps to have something, for sure. Just hold tight and let him be the sweet, supportive SO he’s being. Maybe go ahead and do something to express your appreciation for his support.
Hang in there. You’ll get through this!
Post # 13
I don’t mean to be a Debbie Downer, but my proposal has been postponed because I didn’t get a job for this year (went back to school and hope to start next year). It was going to be tomorrow 🙁
Hopefully the same doesn’t happen for you 🙂
Post # 14
@Britt214: Thanks for the story! Good to know I’m not the only one. We are lucky in that SO makes a very good salary, so we’ll be ok I think for a little bit.
@somethingaquamarine: I agree that it would be different if he didn’t already have the ring. It’s bought, paid for and in his hands. He’s planning to propose before June. Maybe by that time, I’ll have already found a different job.
@deetroitwhat: Thanks, yah my self-esteem is just hurting right now. He’s helping though.
@Loyalfox13: Thank you. Yah I know I’ll be ok. Just the initial shock is hurting right now.
@alsgirl: I’m sorry to hear that 🙁 Fortunately I have a pretty good education behind me and some decent experience so I will hopefully find something soon. I feel that since he has the ring already it probably won’t change things but I’m just not sure.
Post # 15
@DreamingofDiamonds: see everything happens for a reason! You can find something now that will challenge you and allow you to grow!
thats great you are from Seattle! I work downtown but live up north in mill creek