Post # 1
I am writing this post as a way to help me heal. My mother passed away last Monday, after an almost 2-year battle with cancer. The end came very quickly, even though we knew it would happen eventually. She had suffered major setbacks over the course of a month or so, and finally opted for in-home hospice care to help with pain management. 4 days later, she passed away. We thought we had a few months, not mere days.
We had a beautiful funeral, and burial this past Saturday…8 days before Christmas.
I know that she is no longer in pain. I know she will always be with me. I know that these things happen to many people. I think I am just in disbelief that it happened to MY mother, my best friend, my ‘rock’ in life.
I am very blessed that she left us in the hands of many wonderful people, family and friends. I, myself, have a HUGE support system in so many people.
My boyfriend has been wonderful thru it all. He was there every step of the way. I truly believe he is the ‘one’, and I truly think my mother died knowing I found someone to get me thru this, on an intimate level…not just a friend, etc. I fear that this will somehow pull us apart. I do not know why, but I do.
She will never see me get married, or have children…there is so much I will miss. Gosh, this is crazy!!! Thank you for reading.
Post # 3
I am so sorry for your loss. I also think it is important to focus on the fact that while you and your family are greiving, she is no longer in pain.
It sounds like your boyfriend is a great support, and besure to lean on him a bit. Don’t think about this event pulling you apart, but rather look at it as a way for you to grow closer. Be sure to lean on your family and other friends as well.
You have suffered a very hard loss, people will understand your grief.
It may also be helpful to see a grief counselor at some point if you feel your grief is too much for your boyfriend to handle.
My heart really goes out to you.
Post # 4
I’m so sorry to read this post and hear of your loss. Losing a parent has to be one of the hardest things for anyone to go through. It sounds like you have a great support system to get through this. Remember, she may physically be gone, but your mom will always live in in your heart and your memories; your sharing your stories of her keeps her alive for everyone. It sounds like you had a wonderful (albeit short) time with your mother, and you should feel blessed for having such a wonderful woman guide you through your life.
My thoughts and prayers go out to you and your family.
Post # 5
I’m so, so sorry. I can’t imagine what you are going through. I’m so glad you have a wonderful boyfriend to help you through this very difficult time. That’s so important! He sounds wonderful. And that is great that you have a big support system. ((Hugs))
Post # 6
Oh girl I’m so sorry. It’s so hard losing your mom before your wedding. My husband and I got a lot closer when I lost my mom. You are probably just worried about losing him too now, I know I was. I wish you well and hope that you can move forward with your life. You never get past it or forget it but it does get to a point where it doesn’t hurt all the time.
Post # 7
I am very sorry for your great loss. I just wanted to send my condolence to you. I hope that your bf, your family and friends will remain closer than ever.
Post # 8
I am so sorry for your loss. I will keep you in my thoughts.
Post # 9
HUGS to you.
It is so hard to lose a parent, even harder still around the holidays. I don’t know what’s worse seeing them in pain but getting a chance to say goodbye. Or having them pass quickly but losing the chance to say good bye.
I lost my daddy back in 95 suddenly and never got a chance to say good bye. And on my wedding day it was definitely hard not having him there. It was hard knowing he never met my husband, was not there to walk me down the aisle, will never hold my child in his arms.
HUGS to you, I know it does not seem like it now but in time (not days, or weeks, or months or years) the pain will lessen.
Post # 10
I am really sorry for your loss. It’s hard to lose a mom… I can’t even imagine that.
Post # 11
I am so sorry for the loss of you Mom and although there is not much I can say to help you feel better I will keep you and your journey as you heal from this and positive thoughts for your relationship in my prayers.
Stay strong and always remember that although our loved ones may not physically be with us they are watching down on us everyday. If you live like you know they are watching it can hopefully lift some of the weight off of your shoulders.
Post # 12
I am sorry for your loss, I can’t imagine how hard it is losing a parent, she will be in your thoughts everyday
Post # 13
I am so sorry! Losing a parent is very hard. I grieved for my dad for twenty years. Don’t feel like there is a limit on how long you are allowed to grieve. It will get easier just take things one day at a time. I will be praying for you and your family. ((Hugs))
Post # 14
I have tears in my eyes after reading this. I can’t imagine what you’re going through. I’m so sorry for your loss.
Post # 15
@OUgal0004: I am very sorry to hear about your loss. I unfortunatly Know what you are going through. I lost my mother last fall, i was a complete utter mess! My boyfriend was my rock. somedays when I look back…I don’t know how he stood by me through it all. I was a angry crying mess for about 3 months. I took my anger out on him…I was not a girlfriend he deserved! I could hardly take care of myself, let alone be a girlfriend. I just wanted to be alone…but he stuck by and waited. After about 6 months when things started to calm down and I started feeling normal again….I realized how much of an awesome man he really is…to stick by me and my family through such a tramatic time. I knew he was a keeper! I plan on marrying this man. I feel we can handle anything together now. it truly made us stronger.
Right now, it probably seems pretty dark in your world. It does get better with time…. but Im not looking forward to the milestones in life, marriage, babies..etc Something that helped me greatly was a booked called ‘ Talking to heaven’ by James Van Praagh. Now I do not know your religious background ….maybe this book will not be for you. It is very opened minded about death and is writen by a medium. It had a lot of comforting stories and helped me realized that my mom’s spirt is still with me.
Post # 16
To all the ladies who have taken time to reply, sent their condolences, and/or gave me advice…THANK YOU! It was so nice to read such wonderful things.